Slipping a Jewel CD into the player the Author sat down and looked at chapter 40 of Girls with Guns. "What the in the Nine Hells is Furby Hacking?" he asked incredulously. "It's either a rather pleasant thing to do with an axe, an extremely annoying form of hair ball, or an amusing application of computer skills," his ursine avatar replied. "What am I going to do with this mess?" the Author asked with a sigh. "You could always send HIM," the bear replied, invoking the capitals of added emphasis. "Wouldn't it be kind of inappropriate to use HIM?" the Author replied with an atypical note of caution in his voice. "You're asking me?" the SI replied in a tone of slight incredulity. "Good point," the Author paused for a moment before continuing. "But what if Phoebe hasn't seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show?" "She's sufficiently erumed to wing it," the Marty Sam responded dismissively. *********************************************************************** GIRLS WITH GUNS: Because attractive girls in tight outfits with miniskirts are cool, and mystical powers are cool. And the two of them make a cute couple. Think "Improfanfic Double Feature" [I know I did. :) ] The Improbable Adventures of Improfanfic's Co-Mascots Started By: David Kelk, dkelk@sympatico.ca This Chapter By: Philip Barkow Hosted at: Improfanfic, http://www.improfanfic.com Episode Forty-One: Creature of the Night? *********************************************************************** Last time in Epsilon's Aberrant campaign I spent most of the time locked in a cell, meditating. Last time on Girls with Guns: Aika and Becky had just fired rabbit launchers at each other as a rather Machiavellian Akane watched on. As the smoke cleared, it became apparent that both opponents were still standing. "What happened?" Becky asked in a bemused tone. "Out of ammunition! How is that possible, I just reloaded this thing!" Aika complained as she checked her weapon. "We will not tolerate this pointless cruelty against animals!" an unknown figure declared from the sidelines. Looking around, Aika and Becky discovered that they were surrounded. *********************************************************************** MAGICAL DO-GOODERS Data Entry File #542-G: PETA Activists Real Name: People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals Occupation: Student Activists on behalf of animals everywhere (Average PETA Activist statistics, rated on a scale of 1 to 10...) Intelligence: 6 Age: 19-23 Common sense: 2 Measurements: "That tape measure was used to measure someone for a fur coat!" Reflexes: 5 Blood Type: AB- Technical: 4 Favorite Food: Boiled tofu Body: 5 Least Favorite Food: Meat Looks: 4 Hobbies: Protecting and avenging Charisma: 5 innocent animals everywhere. Luck: Just ran out Hit Points: 23 Mana: 11 AC: 8 Abilities: -Come in large numbers -Fearless when protecting/avenging animals May have the Jolly Green Giant on speed dial. Tend to attract attacks from young Mad Scientists. In a pinch, can be eaten as a turkey substitute. Willing to throw their lives away in large numbers in the endless and futile quest to save animals everywhere, PETA activists are considered to be extremely annoying by many protagonists. *********************************************************************** "I can see why," Aika said as she finished reading the Data File. "Agreed," Becky said as she took out a large firearm of some kind. *********************************************************************** At similar fourth dimensional, though utterly different fifth dimensional, co-ordinates: "I thought I was in control of everything here! I wasn't expecting the PETA!" ZerPlotty said in a surprised tone of voice. "No one expects the PETA!" a random PETA activist bellowed, making an easily recognizable cultural reference. ZerPlotty paused for a moment as he utilized his power of plot manipulation. "Hey, you're stealing our schtick!" protested sub commander [not available at your clearance] as he was spontaneously called into existence. *********************************************************************** Meanwhile at a different point within the local fifth dimensional continuum a figure in black lingerie smiled toothily as he took advantage of ZerPlotty's distraction. *********************************************************************** MAGICAL DO-GOODERS Data Entry File #NC-17: Dr. X Real Name: The Plot of the Rocky Horror Picture Show Occupation: Anthropomorphic Story Framework (statistics rated on a scale of 1 to 10...) Intelligence: 8 Age: Do you want that in Transylvanian years? Common sense: 4 Measurements: "Why don't you come and find out for yourself, cutie." Reflexes: 9 Blood Type: O+ Technical: 8 Favorite Food: Whipped cream. Body: 9 Least Favorite Food: Celery Looks: 7 Hobbies: Corruption of innocents Charisma: 10 Luck: Good Hit Points: 36 Mana: 23 AC: 2 Abilities: -Mad Scientist -Dominant/Submissive -Sadist/Masochist -Master of Seduction -Bisexual Vulnerable to anti-matter lasers. May or may not be Doctor Frank N. Furter after having received a power up. Tends to attract a cult following. May be under the direct protection of Kamiversal Jack. As ZerPlotty deals with the PETA Activists the Plot of the Rocky Horror Picture Show is attempting to seize control of the ongoing story. And he's having a wonderful time! *********************************************************************** Aika and Becky surveyed the charred remains of the PETA activists with an air of satisfaction. "That was fun!" Aika exclaimed jubilantly. "Yeah!" agreed Becky. "Sorry about your hamster," Aika apologized embarassedly. "That's okay, sometimes he's a very naughty hamster. Sorry about taking your candy bar," Becky replied, ashamed. "That's okay too. I don't really need the cavities. I like your gun," Aika nervously continued the conversation. "Thanks, I like yours too. It's so BIG!" Becky replied. Both girls paused for a moment before turning away blushing. *********************************************************************** "Damn those interfering PETA activists! Next time I'll get them!" Akane cursed as she observed Aika and Becky through her binoculars. A tear came to her eye as she continued. "Ranma, I will avenge you!" Akane posed defiantly for a couple moments before noticing a cold draft. Glancing downwards she saw that her under garments were absent. Turning to her left she observed Happoussai blissfully cradling her panties. "Hey! I was wearing those you old lech!" Akane shouted angrily as she began to swing an oversized mallet towards the Master of Anything Goes Martial Arts. "BI-DIRECTIONAL-TWO-PART-GLOMP-ATTACK!" Happousai yelled. Noticing an unexpected weight on her hindquarters Akane turned around to discover that she was being glomped by an extremely happy looking Ataru. Akane promptly attempted to designate a new targeting trajectory for her mallet, but was interrupted as Happoussai suddenly glomped her chest. *********************************************************************** "What was that?!" Aika asked in response to Akane's scream. "A cry of anger. Probable source: Young human female with above average lung strength. Approximate Point of Origin: 150 meters North by North West," Agent BA-3 replied "Let's go then," Aika said as she began to sprint. *********************************************************************** Author's Notes: *shrug* I always try to continue the story-lines set in motion by the Author's that precede me. And I believe that is what I did this time as well. I hope it wasn't too over the top. I received a copy of the Rocky Horror Picture Show as a Hannukah present. It has obviously scarred me. :)