Otaku Wish Fuffilment Theater Started by Scott Schimmel Chapter 4: Victoly or Defeat...That, and the Next Seal's WHERE?! o_O? Kate helped Scott up, then performed another one of her Unnecessary Dramatic Poses. "Onward! The first Seal awaits!" That was approxiamtely 5 hours ago. "This sucks!" Steve said wiping the sweat with his bandana, "Where the hell is this seal anyways?!" As predictable as a Goldenboy episode's bounce factor, a large cave suddenly appeared over the horizon. "There!" Kate said, "That's where we'll find the seal!" o_O? Upon arrivng at the cave they seemed to notice that the entrance to the cave wasn't exactly an entrance. Actually it was along the lines of a black iron gate. "The hell?" Steve remarked, slightly out of breath as he now convieniently noticed a small note of paper, Sorry, had to step out for grocery shopping in the town of Tae. Signed The First Boss The group collectively facefaulted. A few hours later the group fell asleep, resting for the impending battle. A small figure opened the door awkwardly, as it was holding what appeared to be 17 shopping bags. o_O? The group woke up raher dazed and confused inside a rather large cave They were interspered along a circular platform that glowed with a shimmering blue hue. Dan stood up rapidly upon regaining consciousness and powered up. He ran to the edge of the platform, only to be shocked a large and powerful force field. Dan was pushed back onto Illyria who emitted a faint sound of pain, and then stood up. As the rest of the group steadied themselves and powered up, the figure emerged from the shadows, though only a shillouette can be seen. "How did you like my defense shield?" the voice was a high pitched sneer. "Who are you?!" "I..." the figure said as it stepped into the light. She was of average height and beauty, though it seemed as though she was a conglomeration of what seemed to be several well known anime females, though slightly discolored and with an aura of computer generated editing. "...am the AVATAR of BAD NORTH AMERICAN DUBBING!!!" she exclained, he lips only moving seven syllables after she started talking. The group blinked as her lips moved with no noise eminating from them for a few minutes. "Um...oookay" Steven said sweatdropping. "You came for the seal didn't you....naughty naughty....I'll have to deal with you myself." The avatar raise her hands and the platform shot out in a stream of blue light. Dan, Kate, Illyria, Arwen and Scott, Fell to their knees. Steve oddly enough, just stood there. The avatar blinked at Steven. "What? My evil Viz-style magic is supposed to affect all with special powers... do you 'have' any special powers, kid?" Whether it was getting the short end of the stick in terms of abilities, or just plain frustration, Steve narrowed his eyes and smiled, narrowing his eyes. "I'm just getting started." Steven stepped from the platform. He searched in his pocket for a focus to concentrate on. Failing that, he found a Sana plushie. He blinked as his headband emitted a bright green light while the kanji for "hyperactive child] celebrity" was now printed on it. Steven shook his head, trying to take it all in and then it began... "ATASHI wa KURATA SANA DESU!" With a speed exceeding that of most commuter trains, Steven spun around the avatar spouting random scenes of various series in Japanese . The avatar struggled to maintain a clear focus of anything Steven said, but the fact that her actions were off sync with anything else made it impossible. Clutching her head, she screamed in sheer agony. "JINKIES AKANE!!" and promptly disappeared, causing the platform to shut down. Steve stopped and fell to the ground in sheer dizziness. Kate stood up uneasily and made her way to Steven. "Wow! That was great!" "Huh..oh, thanks...I think..." Steven said standing slowly while searching his pockets for dramamine. "So where's the seal?" Arwen asked. Suddenly, if predictably, a door opened shimmering with a gold light. The groups collectively walked towards it, Steven looking at the pile of ashes that was the first boss and muttered "Kawaiikunai." o_O? Upon entering the room, they found the gold light was a slightly malfunctioning lava lamp. The only other contents was the quintessential motherlode of pocky. "That's the seal?!" Scott exclaimed. "Yeah! And it's almond crush too!" Kate said, causing everyone to facefault. Shrugging, Dan took the case and somehow caused it to disappear. "What did you do?!" Scott asked. Dan smiled, "What do you think? I put it in our inventory!" Suddenly, another light shimmered. A young teen ageboy, wearing jeans a shirt and something akin to a fisherman's vest appeared. He also had the odd quirk wherein his eyes seemed permanently shut. "Congratulations for attaining the first seal." "Brock from Pokemon?" Illyria asked cooly. The figure sweatdropped "Umm, yeah. Anyways, To get to next seal, you have to reach the land of the Woofers. " Dan took out the map and looked at it. "Let me guess...it's the large island that tooks like a W and a 4 put together, right?" "How did you know?" Brock asked. "Plot contrivance, really." Brock shrugged and said, "Why can I say, funding is low...Anyways, That's where you should get going to." The group nodded and looked at each other. Scott spoke up. "Illyria, if you will..." Illyria smiled slightly, causing the wind to pick up as she quietly slashed Brock into several pieces. The rest of the group smiled and was on their way. o_O? "Lesee..." Dan said, looking at the map, "We're coming near the end of the Dan Woods, but then there's just beach. No towns, no ports..." "So we're stuck?" Steve asked curtly. "No! We just need to look around a bit... that's all," Dan said as more random enemies showed up for the group to get more gold and raise their EXP. Several hours later, it was approaching mid evening when the group decided to rest for the night. "This is ridiculous! We have to get to Woofer Island sooner or later, but how?" Dan asked outloud, deep in thought. The bushes rustled suddenly and the group stood, ready to face more faceless minions. They were rather surprised to see a black, ostrich-like bird emerge from the bushes. The bird looked rather morose for a creature of nature should and was wearing a green headband for no particular reason. "Is that what I think it is?" Scott asked. "Looks like a chocobo to me," Kate said plainly. The bird looked up and said, "Glad you people are warking observant. Yeesh!" "What the? You can talk?" Arwen asked. "No, I'm just making noises which warking reverberate through my larynx, giving the 'impression' of speech...Of course I warking talk. What the wark do you take me for?!" The bird said emitting an aura of depression and annoyance. Kate studied the bird for a moment and thought to herself. She snapped her fingers. "Duh! Morose and annoyed easily at any lack of logic and sense! Hey Ranma X.!" "Kate? Oh wow, good to see you. Didn;t notice you in the kung fu gear. Any reason why I'm here and as an avian?" The group shook their heads and Ranma X. sighed. "Ahh...Damn," Ranma X. said, walking away saying, "This warking sucks..." Dan looked at him leaving and then said, "Wait a sec!" Ranma X. looked back. "What?" "You're a black chocobo, right?" "Looks like it." "Can you fly?" "Never bothered trying, but I guess I could," He said as he tried flapping his wings. He lifted himself slightly off the ground and gave the group a bit of hope. "What the wark?! I can fly! I can- Wark!" Ranma X. exclaimed as he fell to the ground, along with the spirits of the others. "Wait Wait! I'll try again!" He said as he clasped his beak in determination and tried flapping his wings. He started running a bit to get himself a head start. When he finally jumpped off the ground he was soaring above the group "Mother-Wark-er! I can fly!" Ranma X. said as he lowered himself to the ground. "Allright! OOOSHA! We can get to the island now!" Dan exclaimed to the slight dimay of the group. "Wait a minute Dan..We have a 'little' problem..." Steven pointed out. "What?" Dan looked confused as some of his steam had been taken out. "There's six of us. If typical FF rules with Chocobos applies...he can only take four of us." "Oh right....hmm" Dan said, hope deflated. "Wait. Don't get all Warkin' sad on me now..." Ranma X. said. He then let out a high pitched whistle. "Hey, Poster boy for Ritalin! Get over here!" From around the same area as Ranma X. had approached came a strange oddity. It was another Chocobo, like Ranma X. But its color was something akin to the color of a field of lavender....after a copious dosage of LSD. "Hey! How you do? DolPhin! Save the masses of Googly eyed cinnamon dairy cattle!" The group formed a collective sweatdrop. Scott spoke up. "Is that who I 'think' that is?" "Yep. You hit the warkin bullseye." "Zack Hibiki?!" Dan asked, slightly horrified. "Yeah. Kind of a cruel joke..you know 'Ranma X.', 'Z. Hibiki'," Ranma X. said, letting out a sigh. "Can he fly too?" Kate asked. "I dont know...Hey Zack. Can you fly?" "Heyall! The doors of gravitational donkey kong extend to foo-foo my disco clavicle!" Zack said as he jumped in the air and began flying in the air rather remarkably....if it wasn't for the fact he was flying backwards, however possible that was. "Ehh..." Ranma X. sweatdropped, "Um...will that do?" The group didn't respond. Illyria trenchcoat turned an odd shade of yellow. "Uh..Yeah..I guess," Arwen said while Steven shook his head in Dismay. Zack finally came down from the sky. Ranma X. looked at the group. "Okay Divi-up he party. My back can only handle so much," Ranma X. said Scott, Illyria and Kate got on Ranma X. while Arwen, Steven, and Dan got on Zack, though Dan was seated facing the front of the Chocobo, as opposed to the more intelligent move of his collegues of sitting in the reverse position. "No matter! Off to the Woofer islands!!" Dan exclaimed as the Ranma X. and Zack Hibiki took off. o_O? Author notes: Wow...that was fun filled. Thanks to Zack to make sure he was cool with the idea. Thanks to Scott for coming up with a cool starter. Also, thanks to John Evans for letting me casually bounce a few ideas off him. This was probably the most fun I've had in a while, though considering I'm moving dorms ony to move again in two weeks, that may not that hard to do. If anyone cares to know, I'll probably sign up for WEH in a few weeks. I also want to do Genie, but I'll have to see how busy I am... Anyways, see ya around people. Ranma X. "Formatting errors can be addressed by making your hand into a fist, then moving that hand as far away from you as possible, then, keeping that hand still, quickly and forcefully run towards your hand."