"I'm confused," said NeoVid, slouching in his Villain Chair. "I thought you were Ash, Xellos. What gives?" "Ah, that..." Xellos received glares from all around the Villain Table. "...is quite simple. What? What did you think I was going to say?" NeoVid sweat-dropped. "Never mind. Don't worry about it. Keep explaining." "Well, as I was saying, it's quite simple. Since I'm now in charge, I can make other people get blown up repeatedly by the heroes in my place." Somewhere, a young boy in a black cap said plainly: "Ow." Xellos continued. "In fact, along with Ash, I've created several villainous minions that will surely hinder the heroes and dwindle their reserves of strength." "Such as?" prompted NeoVid. "Sore wa...himitsu desu!" "You've only got Ash so far, haven't you?" "..." "Whatever. Anyhow, back to the rave I've been planning..." ^_^;; Otaku Wish Fulfillment Theatre Started by Scott Schimmel Chapter 19: Let's Go! Chojin Sentai Mecha Dan Flies Into Action!...That, and a Game of Ultimate Frisbee for the Seal! By Gaijin Dan Mastriani ^_^v "Yoooooshi!" Dan admired the strangely shiny 5x10 in his hands. "This thing is so UTTERLY cool!" Kate jogged up to Dan's position in front. "Heeeey! Isn't that the picture of Dan Hibiki we couldn't afford to buy off Saikyo-kun? How'd you get it?" "Easy. I stole it while we were beating him into giving us the Seal." "Dan, look," Steve began. "Yeah?" "Nothing, actually." Steve scratched the back of his head. "I just remembered that none of us have the moral high ground right now." "It's magical, but more importantly, it's an autographed 5x10 glossy of Dan! I really couldn't go wrong," Dan remarked, replacing the photo in his coat pocket. "Anyhow, we'd better keep moving if we want to grab that Seal before Xellos gets it or some kid runs off with it or it's eaten by a slime or something." "You know," Scott suddenly spoke, "I've been wondering. What made you decide to be the leader, anyway? I mean, all the time I've known you, I can't recall you ever trying to run anything." Dan stopped and turned to Scott. "You're kidding, right? I mean, it's pretty obvious." "Could have fooled me." Scott folded her arms. "I honestly have no idea." "I'm not the leader because I want to be. I'm the leader because I have to be. My personal feelings really don't enter into it." Scott raised and eyebrow. "How do you figure?" "I'm the red ranger," Dan answered matter-of-factly, as it seemed that this was to Dan all that needed to be said. It was obviously not so for Scott. "And?" "The red ranger is the leader. The red ranger is always the leader." "Seriously?" "Of course, seriously. Don't you ever watch sentai?" "No." "Oh. Well. I guess you'll just have to take my word for it. It really is true, though. I swear." ^_- A small boys hand, wearing a singed green glove, reached painfully out the crater the body it was attached to had made upon impact. The hand strained to grab the crater's edge strongly enough to hold the weight of the body, and pressed down with all its remaining strength. Ash Ketchum slowly emerged and collapsed onto the waiting ground. "You know," Xellos said, appearing in front of Ash, "I don't pay you to lollygag around like this." After a few minutes, Ash finally regained the strength to respond. "You don't pay me." "And if you keep performing like this, I'm not likely to." "Look, did you want something?" "Cheer up, Ash! I've decided to give you another chance! You're going to attack the heroes again!" "Do I have to?" "Yes. However, things should go a bit differently this time. I have a plan, and a little something to help you carry it out." Xellos bent down, and whispered into the boy's ear. "Now, listen closely..." o_O! A horrible, searing beam of light expanded from the muzzle of Dan's gun and rushed forward, engulfing every single thing in its path and obliterating them within its shining path after a scant few seconds. All was lost in bright blue as the sound of whipping wind and trees bending before bursting in a shower of cinder deafened the heroes. Then, everything returned to normal. "9999" appeared above the heads of all the slimes, before they faded into nothingness. "Wasn't that a bit much for slimes?" questioned Steve. Dan shrugged. "Well, it got rid of the lot of them quickly, and there's a little spring just a few feet ahead." "Um, so?" Steve wondered. Kate simply jogged forward and took a sip from the spring. A blue box appeared above the party's heads, reading: "HP/IP Restored." "See?" said Dan. "Fresh water springs restore the party's strength in most games. They're great for level building in dungeons," Kate added helpfully. "In case you were wondering, I happen to have an entire stack of RPGs. No doubt much smaller than Kate's, but I've still played a decent amount," Dan explained. He began to stroke his chin. "You know, it's too bad we don't have a thief. We could filch a lot of free items off enemies." "Maybe Kate could." Scott offered. "Ninja are pretty shifty. No offense." "None taken," Kate answered. "But ninja can only learn Throw. And occasionally Ninja Magic, but that's stuff like weak attack spells and escaping from battle and decreasing enemies hit percentages." "Steve could copy Zidane or Locke or somebody, but he'd probably become a bumbling thief and never be able to steal anything. No offense," Dan thought out loud. "None taken." A bead of sweat appeared alongside Steve's head. "We're wasting time," Illyria stated simply. Dan scratched the back of his head. "Oh. Oops. Illyria's right. We'd better get moving." "Wrong!" shouted a voice. "No," Dan disagreed. "We really do need to get going." "Wrong!" came the voice again. "You're not going anywhere!" Finally picking up on the fact that the voice had not come from among their ranks, the heroes turned as one to behold Ash Ketchum. However, Ash was not attired as usual, for he now sported some sort of boxy metal monstrosity, covering most of his body. "The hell are you wearing, Satoshi?" Dan inquired. "Gaze upon your DOOM, fools! You may have defeated my Pyrite Weapon, but none of you stand a chance against my PokePowersuit!" Ash laughed maniacally. Or, he would have if he weren't a girly little ten year old. The party blinked nearly in unison. Ash continued. "You see, not only does my PokePowersuit make me stronger and faster and all that jazz, but it gives me the powers of all 151 Pokemon!" "251," offered Kate. "What?" "There are 251 Pokemon, as of Gold and Silver," she explained. "Well, I'm from Red, Blue and Yellow. Leave me alone. Anyhow, the powers of 151 are more than enough to beat the likes of YOU! Especially that mecha wannabe power ranger leader of yours!" "Eh?" Dan looked...displeased. "You heard me! I bet you don't even have the guts to face me in a one-on-one mecha duel, you're such a wimpy loser!" Dan scowled. "And what's really sad is that all your heroes from all the mecha shows you watch would do it, cause it's a manly challenge for honor. But I bet that the magical girl over there is more manly than you are!" Dan fumed. Scott wasn't terribly happy either. "That's it!" Dan shouted. "You're on, you scum-sucking fungus! Nobody compares me unfavorably to fictional characters! Especially a five-inch tall toddler that can't decide how he wants to wear his hat like you!" "Um, Dan," Ard tapped Dan on the shoulder. "I know I should probably also go with this honor thing, being the martial artist and all, but I kinda think this is a trick or something." "I don't care! I'm going to cave his face in! You guys go ahead and get the Seal while I finish up here." Dan got into a ready stance. Ash laughed to himself. Everything was going according to plan. He was about to defeat the leader of the heroes. The rest of the party was running of to get the Seal. The...wait a second. "Hey! Where do you think you're going! You're supposed to stay and watch the fight while not doing anything to help! Come back here!" He moved to chase after them. "Your opponent is me!" yelled Dan. And with that, he hit his boosters and rocketed forward, punching Ash in the face. O_o;; The fleeing Destined Heroes came to a brief stop in the next clearing. "Do you guys really think Dan will be okay by himself?" Ard asked. "GEKIGAN FLARE!" echoed in from the distance. Steve sweat-dropped. "Yeah, I think he'll be okay. He's fighting Ash, after all." Ard nodded. "That's true. Anyway, I suppose it's more important we don't get slowed down." "FLAME-THROWER!" came from a short ways away. "Look," stated Illyria, flatly. "Wai!" cried Scott. "It's the Frisbee! We've found the Seal!" The party began to dash for the Frisbee, intent on snatching it and returning to help Dan, when suddenly a group of young boys emerged from the forest and descended upon it. "Keen!" said one. "A Frisbee!" said another. "Let's keep it," said a third. "NUKU NUKU KICK!" rolled over the hills. "Ne, kids," Scott smiled brightly and approached the children. "That happens to be out Frisbee. Could you give it back?" "Bite me, old hag," responded the apparent leader. While Scott was busy nearly fainting, Kate approached the boys. "We really need that Frisbee. Why don't you give it to us?" After a moment of thought, the boy responded. "Play you for it." Not seeing much other choice, since they were rather small boys and it really wouldn't be right to just rough them up, Kate agreed. "Um, okay. What game?" "ROCK THROW!" reached the small clearing. "Ultimate Frisbee," he responded without pause. "We play to five." Kate returned to the group, dragging the still spastic Scott behind her. "He says that he wants to play us in Ultimate Frisbee for it." "Which is?" asked Ard. "I think it's basically touch football with a Frisbee instead of a ball," the finally recovered Scott responded. Steve thought for a second. "How do you kick a Frisbee?" The boys quickly scored four points. "BUSTER BEAM!" "Oh, you meant AMERICAN football," Steve said. "You really ought to remember that the rest of the world uses that for what you call soccer." "Look, that's not important right now," countered Scott. "We're down four-nothing. If they score again, it's over. We've got possession right now, so we really have to make the most of it." The others nodded in agreement. "PAY DAY!" Forming up, the party got ready for a Hail Mary pass to Steve, who would run it in for a touchdown. Checking to her left and right, Scott called for the play to begin, as several of the others rushed off in different directions to confuse the other team. Scott danced back, and threw a perfect pass to Steve, who caught it easily and began to run for the end zone. He was quickly tackled. "We decided that this was full-contact Ultimate Frisbee," said one of the boys, as another caught the fumbled Frisbee and ran it in for the fifth point. The boys then quickly departed with their new toy. "Ow," said Steve. "SUPER NAPALM!" Ard dashed over to Steve. "Steve! Are you okay?" "Since when is there 'full-contact Ultimate Frisbee?" remarked Scott. "Yeah," Steve responded, waving off Ard's assistance. "They were just a bunch of third graders, after all." "But now we've lost the Seal," Kate worried. "How'll we get it from those kids?" "FIRE SPIN!" "I wouldn't worry about that." Steve smiled, and held up the Seal, obviously no longer attached to the bottom of the Frisbee. "I pulled it off when I caught the pass." ^_^ "BOOT TO THE HEAD!" "SEISMIC TOSS!" His best attack effectively countered, Dan crashed to the ground. A quick check of the status screen confirmed it: his IP were low, and his HP lower. He had to admit he was impressed. That PokePowersuit was something. It had made Ash of all people a challenge. "Now you've had it! FLY!" Ash soared into the air for a turn, ready to come down upon Dan and finish him off in the next. "Crap," thought Dan. "There's got to be something I can do..." But nothing came to mind. With his IP so low, he couldn't do any amazingly powerful, sure hit attacks. And what was to stop Ash from countering it? He'd been pretty good at that so far. No, Dan needed to turn the tables. He had to counter Ash. But with what? Dan searched his inventory. Now, each and every one of you should be a Dan Fan. If you're not, I really can't understand, but I won't hold it against you. The thought that you might not be, however, means that I need to explain something. Of all of Dan Hibiki's moves, few have particularly good priority. The one glaring exception to this is an original move Dan only possesses in the Vs. series: the Premium Sign. This move is quite possibly a better anti-air attack than any other move in the game. Gaijin Dan Mastriani is a Dan Fan. Pulling the 5x10 glossy from his inventory, he raised it into the path of Ash's Fly attack. Obligingly, Ash bounced off the photograph and landed on the ground. Quite surprised by how he had been deflected, Ash totally failed to get out of the way as Dan casually flicked the autographed picture towards him. There was a large explosion. x_x The party returned to find a slightly singed but otherwise okay Dan waiting in his normal state. He waved and greeted them as they returned. "Hey, guys!" "Dan!" Ard shouted back. "You're okay!" "You won?" Illyria asked as they reached him. "Yeah, it was no problem," Dan answered, turning to the camera. He smiled such that the light went "ting" off his teeth. "Thanks to Dan." AUTHOR'S NOTES: Bet you thought I was kidding about the Ultimate Frisbee part.