Otaku Wish Fulfillment Theater
Started by Scott Schimmel


Chapter 33:  To Run or To Chase... That, and We're On The Trail!
By Illyria

>.<

	"If I don't get a good night's sleep very soon, I am going to be in
a very bad mood."  Ardweden stared at the ceiling above her bed,
attempting to maintain a scowl as she declared her intentions.  After a
moment of holding it, she sighed.  "Okay, I'll be annoyed."

	Things had been... well, not good, but not horrible.  They seemed to
be on the track of a nice standard RPG, and then it got so complicated
that she couldn't follow more than a bit of what was going on.  Being in
an old-school game had been fun, but she'd be damned if she was going to
get stuck inside Xenogears.

	A creaking outside her door drew her attention, and she sat up in
bed.  "Huh?" she asked.  She cringed as soon as the word escaped her,
then hesitantly looked over to Kate.

	"ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ," said the ninja.

	"...And ninjas are supposed to be the observant ones in a group,"
Ard said under her breath as she slipped out from under the covers.  She
tossed on her orange gi, slid on her slippers, then poked her head out
the door.  When she saw the scene in the hallway, her brow furrowed. 
What was going on?

	Not saying another word, she slipped out the door to investigate
further.

?_?

	"You're sure you didn't hear anything?  Don't ninjas have super
hearing or something?"

	Kate gulped as Dan, Steve, Scott, and Damien looked at her, then
laughed weakly.  "They... must have drugged me."

	"...Right.  So, here's the deal," Dan said as he moved to the middle
of the circle.  "Ard and Illyria are gone, and more than likely, they've
been kidnapped.  We've gotta find where they've been taken and get them
back before the traitor shows their hand... if we're split up, things
could really get dangerous if they could target us in smaller groups."

	Scott and Kate nodded vigorously, but Steve folded his arms across
his chest and frowned.  "Dan... come on.  The traitor just showed his
hand, or hers.  You don't think either of them couldn't fight their way
free if someone tried to take them off somewhere?  Now, if whoever got
kidnapped was surprised, because they THOUGHT they could trust whoever
approached them..."

	The other four looked at each other, then shook their heads. "We
can't afford to think that way yet," Scott said.  "Look at how
suspicious we all were when we were trying to find our way through that
last side quest!  For now, we've gotta be cautious, sure, but we can't
afford to actually accuse people."

	"Hey, whatever you want, but in my view, we've got it narrowed down
to two.  And that's quite an improvement in my book.  I'm gonna go pack.
 Let me know when you're ready."

	As Steve walked off, the rest of the group looked at each other
dubiously.  "Is it just me, or has he been in a weird mood ever since he
got his power-up?"

	"It must just be that time of the month."

	They all blinked at Dan. He blinked back.  "Hey, I was waiting to
use that on him the entire time he was a girl, and then I never got to! 
Give me a break, okay?"

	"Dan?" Kate asked, sugary sweet.

	"Yeah, Kate?"

	*SMACK*

	"Ow.  You're mean."

;_;

	"Has Steve seemed... even stranger to you since we've been on the
road?"

	Damien scratched his head, sending a few fluffs of down to flutter
down to his feet.  "Well, now that you mention it... incredibly so,
yes."

	Between one second and the next, Steve zapped from a door a block
away to the middle of the group.  "These ninja skills of yours rock,
Kate!  The guy didn't want to give me any info, but when I popped up
behind him and then whipped out a gun arm like Dan's, he nearly wet
himself!  Then I held a katana under his throat, because I can be badass
like that... ALL AT THE SAME TIME!  Hahahahahahahaha!"

	"We're... very glad for you, Steve," Dan said, then cleared his
throat.  "How many cups of coffee have you had today, by the way?"

	"None, why?"

	Dan shook his head.  "Okaaaay... anyways, had the guy seen either of
them?"

	"Yeah, he said we just missed the man in the black trenchcoat."

	"Wow," Scott dryly said, "talk about deja vu."

	"And then the total jerk tried to throw me out, but I blasted him
with a Super Magical Shining Z Force Unite.  Then while he was out, I
got us all candy!"  Steve passed out the chocolate treats, mindless of
the looks the rest of the Destined Heroes were exchanging.

	"Super... Magical... what?" Scott finally asked.

	"Isn't it so cool?  I thought hey, since I can use more than one set
of powers at once, I should try combining some of the attacks.  And it
works SO WELL!" Steve cried as he clapped his hands together, looking
oddly like Kate as he did so.  "Hey, do you guys want sodas?"

	"...Sure," they said after a second.

	Steve poofed over to a nearby vendor's stand, then scowled at the
number dispenser.  "Now serving number 56... but... there's no tabs! 
Give me a number.  GIVE ME A NUMBER!"

	"..." said the rest of the Heroes.

	"...Mother..."

	"...Uh... Let's go before he starts acting like Usagi."

	"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

	"Dammit."

X_x

	"Dan, do you have anything in your databanks about psychology?"

	Dan shook his head as the group progressed along the country road,
lead by Steve and his amazing ninja/fighter/sentai hero awareness. 
"Nope."

	"You're sure?  Not on... say... Multiple Personality Disorder?" Kate
asked hopefully.

	"Nope.  And I've been looking.  Believe me."  Dan shook his head. 
"You know, when people get leveled up, it's typically a GOOD thing. 
When you go talk to Bahamut, that's a good thing.  When you go to Mt.
Ordeals, that's a good thing.  But nooooo, we get to deal with this..."

	"In the name of the moon, I will... uh... what was I saying?  Oh,
right!  Go go, Power Rangers!"

	"STEVE!"

	The sidekick blinked, then relaxed out of his powerpose.  "What? 
You threw off my groove."

	"Do you realize that you've gone utterly and totally INSANE?" Scott
demanded, storming past the rest of the group.  "Stop using all those
powers at once!  It's messing with your head!"

	"Huh?"

	"Do you realize that last night, you sketched out a design for a
mecha wearing a miniskirt and a trenchcoat who was otherwise painted
with ninja clothes with orange trim, and you thought it looked GOOD?" 
Scott raised her eyebrow.  "At least show some restraint, or something! 
I may not like being in this body, but I'd like to be the only person
who tries to be in my head!  Do you understand what I'm saying?"

	"No."

	"You've gone loony!  As loony as a bat!  As loony as Kefka and
Prince Luca combined!"

	Steve slowly walked forward, realization crossing his features
despite his best efforts to ward it off.  "Do you mean to tell me that
now that I finally have enough powers to be of some use... using them
means I'll go all MPD on everyone?"

	"Yes, that's what we've been trying to tell you all along!"

	Steve stared at Scott.  The wind picked up.  A stray leaf skittered
by.  Finally, the sidekick threw back his head and wailed, "The universe
hates me!"

	Another leaf skittered by as Steve looked down at her new - but
familiar - form.  "Aww, CRAP!"

>.<

	"I am but a grain of sand in the hourglass of time.  I am falling
into the void with my fellow grains, measuring the progression of the
universe as we lose ourselves to infinity.  Like sand through the
hourglass, so are the days of our lives."  Steve poked an eye open as
she adjusted her impossibly-arranged yoga position and looked up at Dan.
 "Still a girl?"

	"Yup."

	"Argh!  No, no, calm.  I am calm, I am collected, I am a newborn
puppy-"

	"Puppies aren't calm."

	"...I am a newborn goldfish, swimming through the still waters of my
aquarium until food flakes fall onto the surface and I wind up chasing
after one that floats down to the little scuba diver-"

	Dan's eyebrow shot up further.  "You know, you suck at this
meditation stuff."

	"You're not helping, Dan!"  Steve took a few more deep breaths, then
pushed her arms away from her.  "I'm pushing the bad thoughts away. 
Away, bad thoughts, away!"

	"Steve..." Dan slowly began.

	"What?  This had better be good."

	"Well... hmm, how should I say this.  You... ah... well... um...
when you use one power, you're fine.  When you use more than one, this
stuff happens."  He tugged at his collar.  "So... maybe... you should
focus on being a sidekick again."

	Steve winced.  "But... but... away, bad thoughts, away?"  She waved
her hands around a few more times, then sighed.  "This isn't fair!  I
finally get on a level with the rest of the group, and now I can't do
it?"

	Dan got down on his heels and patted Steve on her shoulder.  "Look
at it this way... you can always imitate one of us to help out, and if
we're really in a jam... well... you can be our secret weapon, and we'll
just deal with you going wonky after you save our collective asses,
okay?"

	Steve scrubbed at her cheeks.  "I get to save our collective asses?"

	"Uh, sure!  I'm sure there'll be a cause for it.  And then you can
unload your Magical Princess Super Team Alpha Mad Wind Ninja Skeelz on
them, and we'll deal with the whole Brady Bunch in your head result. 
Sounds good?"

	"...Yeah."  Steve got to her feet and smiled lopsidedly.  "It sounds
good to have a reason to be here besides being the comic relief or the
guy who gets killed for a plot point."  She shrugged.  "Looking at it
that way... well, it's not so bad being... the sidekick."  At the role
admission, Steve blinked and looked down at himself.  "Hey, it worked!"

	Dan let out a sigh of relief.  "Good.  Just keep in that sidekick
mindset, and you should be fine."

	"Steve, Dan!  We think we found their trail!"

	Dan blinked at Scott, Kate, and Damien as they came running (or
flying) towards them.  "Wow, you guys' dramatic timing is spot-on."

	"It leads into that forest there," Scott said as she pointed to a
ridiculously ominous-looking spread of trees that lay between two twin
mountain peaks.  "One has a cave filled with ice... it's Cold Mountain. 
The other has a cave filled with fire... it's Fury Mountain."

	"........I was wondering when we'd hit the next weird name," Dan
said as he shook his head.  "Well, let's get a move on.  We have to find
out which cave the kidnappers took them to."

	"You mean which cave the kidnapper took the other one to."

	"Steve..." the entire group said.

	"Hey, this paranoia is all me, baby."  He pointed towards the
forest.  "Now lead on, guys, and remember, as I'm keeping myself in
check, it's up to you all to put yourselves in the path of any danger
before it can reach me."  He grinned at their dubious expressions. 
"Maybe this isn't so bad, after all."

?_?

	"Stop being an idiot and come back to the group!" Ardweden demanded
as she stomped her foot down onto the forest trail.  "Do you have any
idea what you're doing?"

	Illyria simply nodded once, then turned his back on the fighter and
proceeded on the path.  After realizing that he was planning to leave
her behind if she didn't accompany him, Ard scurried forward and
attempted to match his pace.  "Do you know what will happen?  If you
just take off like this, everyone's going to think you're the traitor!"

	"I know."

	Ard blinked a few times.  "You know... wait, does that mean you
really are-"

	"Of course not," Illyria said sharply, finally looking back over his
shoulder at her.  "But they can think that."

	"You want them to think you're the traitor?  Why?"

	"Then they'll stop worrying."  He finally drew to a halt.  "And then
they can all work together again, like they need to.  So don't tell
them."

	Ardweden blinked.  "Don't tell them?  Well, of course I won't tell
them, I'm going with you!  I'm not going to let you go off on your own,
so you can get picked off!"

	The next five minutes were filled with arguing, which was not as
productive as you'd expect, even with it being between a stubborn girl
like Ardweden and a bishounen that was terse even compared to the rest
of his ilk. 

	"...Fine," Illyria finally agreed.  He drew out a piece of paper,
scribbled down a note on it, then stabbed it into a nearby tree with a
sharp stone. "Let's go."

	"Yaaay!" Ard cried, clapping her hands.  "This will be an adventure!
 I wonder how long it will take everyone to be good friends again?"

	"Not long, hopefully.  Let's go.  They can't catch up."

o_o

	"There's a note on that tree!" Kate yelled as she pointed forward
into the depths of the forest.  Forgetting their long journey past the
edge of the oppressive woods, the quintet rushed forward to examine it.

	Dan carefully pried it off the trunk, careful not to rip the paper
as he pulled it free.  "It looks like it's been up here about half a
day, based on my analysis of the ink's fading and the amount of dirt
that's blown up onto i-"

	"JUST READ IT!" demanded the rest of the group.

	"No one appreciates scientific knowledge," Dan pouted as he flipped
his scanner visor away from his face.  "Okay... 'Kidnapped Ardweden.  Do
not follow.  -Illyria'"  He blinked at the paper again.  "I don't
believe it."

	"I knew it," Steve muttered under his breath.

	"No..." Scott and Kate said, identical crestfallen expressions on
both faces.

	Damien looked off at nothing in particular, then finally said, "At
least we know, now..."

	"Yeah," Dan said quietly, crumpling the paper in his fist.  "We do
know.  And now that we know, we can work together!  We'll save Ard, beat
Xelloss, and then show that traitor what happens when you mess with the
Destined Heroes!"  He pumped his fist in the air, calling for a cheer to
match his speech, but it didn't come.  His shoulder sagged, and he
nodded tiredly.  "...Come on, guys.  Let's go."

	"Can I say it?  Please?  I'll change right back!"

	Dan sighed.  "Go ahead, Steve."

	He poofed into a ninja costume, struck a sentai powerpose, and
yelled, "To all those who would stand against us... in the name of the
moon, I will punish you!"  He clapped his hands together.  "Thanks!"

	"You're welcome.  Now stop doing that."

!_!

Author's Notes:

Me: "Hmm. I don't want to write myself much at all, to make sure the
focus of the episode is on someone else."
Ardweden: "Hey, can you get Ard out of the picture for most of it, too?"
Me: "Sure, I can find some way to get them away from the main plot!"

*cough*

So that's why this happened, in part, anyways.  The other part is that
chase plots are easy to do, provide a general focus that lots of other
stuff can be heaped on as other authors deem fit, and generally are good
devices.

If any stuff worked against any developments that have happened, I
apologize... I read through episodes, asked other OWF readers, and we
STILL couldn't follow everything that had happened.  As this is a chibi,
after all, I just went with what I could get and tried to make the most
of it.  Hope it worked out that way.

-Illyria