Damien Roc panted as he reached the top of the colossal skyscraper. The elevator hadn't fit his bike, and he didn't want to just leave it down on the street, so he'd had to walk it up the fifty-something flights of stairs. It had taken him ten hours, and all he'd had to eat were a few sticks of pocky a little kid had given him. But he was here, and it was worth it. Damien stepped to the edge of the roof, peering nervously down to the busy streets below. It really was magnificent...but it was so high up. He'd have to be extra careful that he didn't fall. He took a deep breath, and screamed out to the world below him... "IS ANYBODY DOWN THERE NAMED PHOEBE????" ------ Improfanfic Party, part 13: "101 Uses for Grape Jello" started by W4 This part by Omi no Miko ------ The scene in the attic was one of pure evil...well, maybe not pure. And not exactly *evil*, either...mischevious? Yes...brillant? Possibly. But evil? Well...maybe. But not pure evil. Maybe the bastard child of evil...without, you know, all the emotional baggage and all that. Anyway, the five semi-evil partygoers had gathered in the attic, and were conversing softly. Every once in a while somebody would snicker, or Omi would let out a psychotic giggle. After a while, they all stood up, with determined looks in their eyes. "I don't know what's going to happen, or if this'll work..." Roe began, "But one way or another, that coat's coming OFF!" Evil laughter ensued. ---- W4 found Twoflower in the living room, munching on a bag of Doritos. He walked over calmly, wondering what Twoflower could possibly want him to "handle". "Hey, boss!" he greeted 2F, "Calc said you wanted to talk to me about something." "Yeah..." 2F said, pulling out the post-it note. "I got this a while back...what do you think?" "..." W4 replied. "Anyway," 2F continued, "I keep hearing evil laughter coming from the basement, so could you go check it out? You know, see what's going on down there." "Yeah, sure..." W4 agreed, heading towards the basement. ---- Safely isolated from the rest of the world, Aaron Shattuck was, surprisingly, finding ways to occupy himself. The novelty of banging his head on the wall had worn off after a few hours, and he was now playing with a (non-Controversial) Jack-in-the-Box that he had found crammed in the back of the closet. It had started to get boring, since he had been turning the crank for five minutes and nothing had happened. In frustration, he turned it upside-down and shook it. The clown fell out with a noose around his neck and a note in his hand. It read, "I can't take that damned song any more!!" "Kewlll..." said Aaron. ---- After the attic meeting had broken up, everybody had gone seperate ways, to gather ingredients and such. Omi had gone straight to the kitchen, knowing well her purpose. "Now..." she mumbled to herself, "How do I get those dogs out of there?" She picked through the items in the bag for a bits, then pulled out what looked like a stuffed cat. She pulled a string in its side, and it started meowing loudly. All the dogs stopped eating immedietly, and turned toward Omi. "Go! Go, get it! Go!" she exclaimed, throwing the toy cat out the window. The small dogs piled out the window as fast as they could, only a couple stalling to take a few extra bites of taco. Omi smirked at the yappy little doggies. "Idiot dogs...now, for my true purpose!" After a brief evil chuckle, Omi began rummaged around in a large bag for a few minutes, tossing out various items such as handcuffs, leashes, whips, and dog collars, as if she was searching for something in particular. "Hey, Omi!" Roe said, choosing that moment to walk in, "Need any help getting the...whoa..." "Hmmmmm???" Omi hmmmed, holding up a complicated torture device. "Oh, I'm just looking for my grape jello. I've got so much junk in here..." Roe smiled, nodded, and backed away slowly. ---- Dan and Todd, having successfully returned to Chez Impro, were currently trying to find Epsilon. Wherever they could find the correcting critic, they would find his red pen. They wandered all around the house, and had just started to explore the outside when they saw what appeared to be...an unconscious Epsilon? "This is it!" Todd whispered to Dan, from their hiding place in the bushes. "The pen must be somewhere over there! Come on, let's go!" Just then, Blade ran over to check on his boss. Todd and Dan shrunk back into the bushes, and watched from there. "Boss! Boss! Are you all right? Wake up, Epsi!" *WHACK!* "Thou shalt not call me Epsi..." Epsilon muttered in his sleep. ---- Omi had found it...her god, her one tool for destruction. Better than anything else she could possibly find in her bag, she'd found her reliable, lifelong friend. Whenever she'd felt down, it had helped her cheer up. It was sacred, special, one of a kind... It was a large crate of grape jello. ---- After distributong pie to the pleased partygoers, Illyria decided to wander about the house for a bit. She walked into the front room, and was greeted to the rather comical sight of a person shaped hole in a nearby closet. She could've sworn that it wasn't there before...and she had heard some unusual banging and giggling moises coming from over there. "Hey, 2F!" she called, beckoning him over. "Was that hole supposed to be there?" 2F blinked. The hole bore a striking resemblance to...Aaron Shattuck. And he *had* been locked up in there...2f cautiously opened the closet door, and found nothing but a Jack-In-the-Box on a noose. "...aw, hell." ---- Returning to his stolen death machin- um, car, along with his new friend the Suicidal Clown, Aaron was distracted by the plaintive cries of Chippy. Having heard somebody outside, Chippy had redoubled his his attempts to be noticed by anyone. "HEY! IS SOMEONE OUT THERE?!" "Yeah, someone's out here." Aaron answered. "Oh dear God no..." Chippy said in a tone typically associated with people who were strapped to tables with their eyes clipped open (which was one of the thing Chippy was expecting to happen). With a burst of adrenaline granting him almost leprechaun-like strength, the gnome managed to shove the glove compartment open and jump out an open window into the nearby limo. "Ha! You're not getting away like that!" Aaron yelled at him. Then, an idea popped into what must, for lack of a more accurate term, be called Aaron's mind. It went: "Limo. Big. Things fly farther when limo hits them." (the next thought that followed was, hopefully, irrelevant, considering it went 'Your a fagot goh tu hel yu frooty homoh') The idea prompted him to smash the window of Stephica's limo with Suicidal Clown's solid metal box and take off in it (after, of course, duct taping Chippy to the roof so he wouldn't try to jump out). ---- Approaching the GGG, NeoVid told Fatman, "Now this is beautiful. Everything a fighting game fanatic could dream of... EXCEPT... it's missing just one game!" He took a board from an arcade game out of his jacket. There was a moment of reverential silence from the other gamers as they saw the label taped to it... "SNK vs Capcom?!" Fatman said in a shocked tone. "Nobody could have gotten that yet!" "No NORMAL people, you mean! Now just plug and play! Heh ha ha!" NeoVid manic/schizopheniced. It commenced with the Battle of the Ripoffs: Dan Hibiki vs Ryo Sakazaki. ---- Eslington made his way toward the newly dog-free kitchen, having gotten the sudden craving for food. He noticed that Omi was sitting up on the counter, seemingly engrossed in a book. "Hey, Omi...whatcha reading?" he asked, trying to catch a glimpse of the contents of the book, while avoiding stepping in the remains of the chihuahuas' lunch. "Oh!" Omi blinked, looking up. "Jello recipes...and bishonen recipes. The bishonens kinda come naturally after the jello, y'know?" she said brightly. Eslington blinked, wondering just how one could get 400 pages of jello recipes. Deciding to ponder the matter later, he came to the conclusion that food was the first priority here. He opened the refrigerator, only to find... "Um, Omi?" Eslington asked, looking up at the fangirl, "Why is there only jello in the refrigerator?" Omi gave him an odd look. "Well, you can't very well set jello if it's not in the refrigerator, can you?" "Ah...okay, then." Eslington nodded, making a mental note not to ask stupid questions in the future. ---- W4 cautiously made his way to the basement, not quite sure what to expect. Sure, almost everyone at the party was known to let out a little evil laughter every once in a while, but they didn't usually have super-secret bases. Not that the basement was all that secret... He opened the basement door, just as another evil laugh broke out. The laugh stopped abruptly as he walked in, and he was faced with the odd sight of Chris staring in front of a mirror and practicing his evil laugh. "Er...what exactly is going on here?" W4 asked, looking around. "It looks like the secret hideout for some kind of evil orginaza-ACK!!" Chris grabbed W4, and within seconds he had been tightly bound to a swivel chair. "HA!" Chris began, "You're smart, you found the super secret hideout if SLID, but now I, leader of the Impro Inquisition, will have the last laugh! MWAHAHAHA!!!!" he laughed, then as if to illustrate his point better, he added, "HAHAHA!" W4 bklinked, confused, "Actually, I just came to find out if you were doing all that evil laughing and all...I didn't really expect the Impro Inquisition-" "NOBODY EXPECTS THE IMPRO INQUISITION!!!!" "I was expecting you would say that." ---- Amazingly, Aaron had avoided slamming his stolen limo directly into any large, immobile objects, so it was still giving a performance that any driver in Twisted Metal would be proud of. "You see that, Chippy??" the manic maniac said loudly over the screams from outside. "Squeezing between pedestrians like that?!?" "Yes, but that alley was only six inches wider than the limo..." ---- Jonatan wandered out to the front yard, to where Bob the Formerly Alive Bishonen Driver was. He wondered if he could possibly salvage the poor thing. Even...even make it better! Yes! A cyber-bishonen! Jonatan spontaneously broke out into evil laughter, getting the attention of Eslington, who had miraculously found a can of Dr. Pepper in the chaos that was the kitchen. He walked over to the plotting Jonatan, curious. "I'll make him perfect! Perfect, I say!" Jonatan exclaimed, chuckling a bit in anticipation. "Hey, you're not going to turn the remains of Stephica's bishonen into a new and improved cyber agent, are you?" Eslington asked. "..." Jonatan replied. Then, "...No. No, not at all! Aheh..." "Oh, good." Eslington replied, "Because you're too drunk to do that." "I am not drunk!" Jonatan protested. "Well, then how many fingers am I holding up?" Eslington demanded. "Thursday." Eslington sighed. "I told you so, you're too drunk." "Nonsense!" Jonatan exclaimed, "In fact, I'm gonna go make a cyber bishonen right now! I just need all the parts..." he started making a mental list of things he'd need, not concentrating on his surroundings. In fact, he was so out of it that he walked right into a wall. *BAM!* "I told him he was too drunk..." Eslington said, standing over the unconscious Jonatan. ---- The five mischevious partygoers regrouped in the attic, having gathered everything they needed. Omi had somehow filled a spare bathtub with jello, and Stephica had found an old chess set made of wood. "Oooohhhh..." Delfina gushed, grinning in anticipation. "This is just *perfect*! But did you really need all that jello, Omi-chan! We haven't got it *yet*, you know." "Hey, you can never have too much grape jello!" Omi exclaimed, clutching her precious bathtub of goodness. "Personally, I don't care for grape jello..." Stephica said, making a face. "I wonder what he's got in there..." Lusipher muttered to himself. The others all nodded, each one speculating what was inside the seemingly endless void. "Anyway, no matter what's inside, it's going to be mine! ALL MINE! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!" There was a brief silence as everyone glared at Roe. "Errr...ours, that is. Aheh..." *BAM!* "Aaaaahhh!" Delfina yelped in surprise. Illyria stood at the door, panting slightly. "Have *any* of you seen Aaron Shattuck around here? He's on the loose!" she demanded. "...Aaron Shattuck..." Lusipher began, "...is running FREE around SAN DIEGO?!" "I'm afraid so." Illyria said, nodding solemnly. "He got out of the closet where he was locked up." "...Damn, that's gotta suck..." Suddenly, Roe had an inspiration. "Hey Illyria, wanna help us out with something fun?" Illyria considered the question for all of two seconds. "Sure, it's not like I have anything *important* to do." ---- Lady Chaos wandered around outside Chez Impro, looking for something to do. She noticed that Eslington was standing over the unconscious body of Jonatan. She blinked, then walked over to the two. "What happened here?" she asked, looking down at Jonatan. "He had a bit too much to drink." Eslington replied. "Oh...too bad." "Yeah...I told him so, but he walked right into the wall." "Oh...too bad." "Yeah, so now he probably won't wake up for a while." "Oh...that's great!" "Yeah, the alcohol will probably wear off by...huh?" Chaos was already bent over Jonatan's body, and was rolling up his sleeve. She began rummaging through her pockets, as if looking for something. "Ummm...if you don't mind me asking, what exactly are you doing?" "Oh, just tattooing a little something on his arm...you wouldn't happen to have a needle on hand, would you?" "Well, let me just check..." ---- Much later, Jonatan awoke with the feeling of a mild itching on his arm. He didn't feel very drunk anymore...he supposed he must've slept it off. He felt fine...but he still had the vague feeling that something wasn't quite right. He made a mental checklist of all his parts. Head? Check...legs and feet? Check...arms and hands? Check...#229 tattoo on his shoulder? Check...waitasec. Sonce when did he have a #229 tattoo? "Oh! Lady Chaos stopped by and tattooed that to your shoulder while you were unconscious." Eslington said, peering down at him. "Oh...that's nice." Just then, Roe blink teleported into the room. "Hey, Jonatan..." he started, "Wanna come play a fun game?" ---- "...and that's the plan!" Stephica finished telling Illyria. "So, what do you think?" "...Wow that's really something." Illyria said, in awe. "But what if it doesn't work?" "No way it won't work!" Delfina exclaimed, "No guy can resist Steph's attractive power!" Roe chose that moment to blink teleport in, with Jonatan beside him. He nodded slightly to the other four, then motioned for Stephica and Jonatan to sit at the table with the chess board on it. "All right, people...this is it." he said, the paused for dramatic effect. "The game is...strip chess!" =====End part 13!===== Author's notes: Special thanks to Eslington for prereading, and to NeoVid, Roe, Jonatan Streith, Yun Cheolsu, and Damien Roc for scenes and suggestions. Without you people, I'd be lost. ^_^ Oh...and I meow at you all. So there. ---- LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION! Person Location Twoflower: living room Roe: attic W4: tied up in the basement Lusipher: attic Calculus: Chez Impro NeoVid: GGG Omi no Miko: attic Delfina: attic Ardweden: Maybe SLID Stephica: attic Eslington: Outside Chez Impro Aaron: The beach nihility (Eric): The beach Dan Wood: In the bushes Chris Nichols: The basement (aka SLID) Todd: In the bushes Lawrence: still Lurking Anko: The deck Damien Roc: Japan Myth: Just back from the past NickM: Anorexia Ravi: At the bar Jake: Chez Impro Hottcoffee: Scavenging Monica: Under a desk BlackMage: Anorexia Fatman: GGG Epsilon: Unconsious outside of Chez Impro Blade: Near Epsilon Random: the Impro Taxi Katy: the Impro Taxi Illyria: Attic Eternal Lost Lurker: Chez Impro Rain: near Chez Impro looking for slingshot Chaos: Chez Impro Squall: Chez Impro Jonatan: Attic Aaron Shattuck: driving in San Diego H: Chez Impro Yun Cheolsu: Lost in San Diego Iron Chef Chen Kenichi: The kitchen Mecha Tom Green: San Diego Bishounen chauffeur: Crushed underneath a stolen car Leonardo DiCaprio: Hollywood Dragon: being the Impro taxi Jess: Just back from the past Zombie Elvis: Kitchen area Keith Richards: Chez Impro