IMPROFANFIC BEACH PARTY RULES: Rule #0 (The "In the Beginning" Rule): The party will begin at 10am on a Saturday morning and will continue until all party guests: a) return home, or b) are rendered unconscious. The party staff are considered "home" since they get to clean up afterwards. (To see who's on staff and who's a guest or crasher, see the Party Profiles page. - Roe) Rule #1: The following restrictions apply when bringing people or things to the party: Rule #1a (The "American Pie-Faced" Rule): Any party guest who brings "unvirginized" food will be forced to eat the offending foodstuffs him/her/itself. Rule #1b (The "Share It If You Got It" Rule): Any party guest who brings food, drink, alcohol or cigarettes must bring enough for everyone currently at the party. Rule #1c (The "Control of Uncontrolled Substances" Rule): Any party guest who brings anything stronger than alcohol or cigarettes will be defenstrated. Thrice if it's reefers. Rule #1d (The "They'd Trash Us Anyways" Rule): No Improfanfic or Anime characters are allowed to join the party. No non-imrpo or non-anime fictional characters either. The most we'll allow is being dropped off at the party by a fictional charcter and only if there's some humor involved. Rule #1e (The "Consider it a G-Rated Leather Strap Match" Rule): Any party guest who brings a wrestler or similarly-minded athlete to the party must keep said wrestler/athlete on a leash at all times. The party guest assumes all responsibilites for damage and incidents caused by the wrestler/athlete. Rule #2 (The "It's Good to See You! Who the Heck Are You?" Rule): Party guests (and their guests, when applicable) are required to fill out a party profile form. This will help the staff and guests from triggering allergies, causing incidents, and, most importantly, decide with whom they should try to "get it on". Rule #2 (The "This is a Party. NOT a Fighting Tourney" Rule): Party guests who feel a strong urge to bring weapons to the party are restricted to Nerf weapons. Hammerspace and Furniturespace access is restricted to admins. (That's right. Being on the party staff isn't enough for Hammerspace and Furniturespace access. Party guests who volunteer to clean up afterwards in hopes of malleting other party guests are in for a disappointment.) Rule #2 (The "Swords into Plowshares" Rule): Party guests that have an aversion/vendetta/etc. to another party guest are strongly advised to avoid that particular guest. If a party guest is under the delusion that it is his/her/its God-given duty to intentionally and maliciously aggravate another guest, the party staff and admins will be more than happy to "disillusion" the deluded guest. Rule #2 (The "The Buddy System" Rule): The area around the makeshift beach house offers many activities (i.e. beach, amusement park, Sea World). Party guests are encouraged to take advantage of the sights and sounds. But party guests are required to travel in groups of at least two. That way, if the natives get restless, or just plain rude, party guests have buddies on which they can rely. Rule #2 (The "Well, DUH!" Rule): If a party guest is a little drunk (or a LOT drunk) and feels the need to travel somewhere, they must... and the party staff means MUST... get a designated driver (i.e. W4) to drive, fly, teleport, or whatever, them to their destination and back. Rule #2 (The "Clean Up Your Trashed... Self" Rule): If a party guest gets a little drunk (or a LOT drunk), sleepy, or feels the need to relinquish consciousness, the party guest is encouraged to find a safe place to store his/her/its body (i.e. bedroom, dumpster). That way, a) the local police won't find the unconscious guest and trace said guest back to the party, and b) the natives won't find the unconscious guest, mistake him/her/it for a life-sized doll, and claim it. Rule #2 (The "Natives are People, Too" Rule): Party guests are encouraged to mingle with the locals. Scaring, threatening or mistreating locals, on the other hand, is a rock-stupid thing to do. Rule #2 (The "Cute and Cuddly" Rule): Any party guest with a plushie must either share it or bring enough for everyone. Be warned, though, that excessively cute plushies may be examined by the admins. Also, if fights break out in regards to plushies, then the offending plushie, as well as the dueling guests, will be thrown off the pier. Rule #2 (The "Sore Wa Himitsu Desu MY BUTT!" Rule, or The "Cute and Cuddly" Corollary): Any and all Xelloss plushies will be searched. Rule #4 (The "Golf" Rule): If a party guest either renders something airborne or notices something being rendered airborne, it is customary, but not required, to yell, "FORE!" Rule #5 (The "Three, Sir. Three." Rule): There is no rule number five. Rule #6 (The "Golfing Under the Influence" Rule): If a party guest is a little drunk (or a LOT drunk) and either renders something airborne or notices something being rendered airborne, it is customary, but not required, to yell, "SIX!" Rule #69 (The "Nudge-Nudge-Wink-Wink" Rule): Romantic involvements are allowed only between two consenting party guests. Party guests that wish to get "excessively romantic" are required to segregate themselves in a room so the rest of the guests don't have to watch the sickeningly mushy stuff. Rule #351 (The "NeoPuu and W4Java" Rule): There will be no cooking, eating or drinking of other party guests as foodstuffs. Rule #666. Elder Gods are not allowed on Party property. Rule #666-A. Elder Gods, demons, and all other supernatural entities widely recognized (or designated by Party staff) as "evil" (hereafter collectively referred to as "evil entities") are not allowed on Party property. This restriction (and the term "evil entities", as used within this document) does not, however, apply to regular members of the Improfanfic community who happen to be demons. Questions over the meaning of "regular members" will be settled by the administrators. Rule #666-B. Evil entities are also not allowed within 100 feet of Party property, nor in malls, shops, or restaurants being visited by Party guests or staff. Rule #666-C. Evil entities are not allowed to stand on highway offramps holding signs saying "WILL WORK FOR SOULS" while those offramps are in use by Party guests or staff. Rule #666-D. Plushies resembling evil entities are not allowed. Rule #666-E. Exceptions to rules 666 through 666-D are made for Xelloss. Rule# 666-F. Evil entities wearing chibi-Xelloss costumes are not allowed. This means you, Hastur. Rule #666-G. Deliverymen, repairmen, caterers, etc. possessed by evil entities are not allowed on Party property.