][ Jesse Ellman HAS JOINED THE PARTY AS A GUEST

Name: Jesse Ellman   Sex: M   Physical Age: 18   True Age: 18 
Also Goes By: Not the person from Team Rocket
Height: 5'11"        Weight: 125 lbs.        Eyes: Brown  Hair: Brown

Primary Goal(s): 
-To meet some of the people I've been talking to on #Impro
-To get away from the opressive hell that is Cornell (rhyme unintentional...)
-To extract horrid revenge on those who criticized my fanf...err, to make
 some new friends. Yeah, that's the ticket. [Sweatdrops nervously]
			

Secondary Goal(s):
-Not to make too much of an ass of himself
-Convince people that the Tifa/Cloud thing really did make sense...

Strengths/Abilities:
-Runs fast 
-Can swin decently
-Mad gun game (ie Time Crisis) skills
-Hard to offend/annoy
-Can get laughs with random, semi-inane, semi-insane comments and rants
-Can crack a one liner in response to nearly any statement
-Sarcastic New Yorker
-Ridiculous movie trivia knowledge
-Can eat anything without gaining weight
-Can silence chatrooms with a single comment!
-Has read nearly every Ranma fanfic in existance (and yet can't keep
 Ranma's characterization straight...)
-Gives good advice/easy to talk to
-Generally willing to help others

Weaknesses/Quirks:
-Insane comments often scare others away
-No upper body strength
-No lower body strength
-Generally skinny and weak
-Vision suffers w/o glasses
-Easily annoyed by arrogance/gross stupidity
-Sarcastic New Yorker
-Takes a while to get comfortable around new people
-Can't dance worth a damn
-NO fighting game skill whatsoever
-Can't deal with peole who can't take jokes
-Limited actual anime watching experience

Likes:
-Football (Go Jets...*sigh*)
-Pretzels
-Swords
-Oddness
-People with a sense of humor
-Instrumental music
-Anime (obviously...)
-Good movies

Dislikes:
-Arrogant people
-Bad movies
-Continuity errors
-The front line for the 1976 Philedelphia Flyers
-People who are too serious
-Gross stupidity
-Those stupid Gap commercials

Background:
After escaping from his home town of Staten Island, NY (home of the world's
largest garbage dump), Jesse soon found that his new home, Cornell
University, wasn't a hell of a lot better. To ease the suffering, Jesse
plunges himself into the Impro community, becoming a dedicated lurker.
After a couple of months of this, he realized that perhaps it would be more
enjoyable if he actually got INVOLVED in said community. With this in mind,
he signed up for Ultra and wrote an episode of that Impro, a crime for
which he was tarred, feathered, and tossed into a pit of rabid ninja
wombats. Barely escaping with his life, Jesse decided that maybe it wasn't
the best time to use the invitation to Improparty that he had recieved.
That and the fact that he has the social grace and tact of a drunk water
buffalo...but I digress. After a month or so of semi-lurking in the chat
room and reviewing every Ultra part exactly seven minutes and 12 seconds
after it was posted, Jesse decided to take a chance and head out to sunny
California. After all, what cold possibly go wrong? [Pan camera and fade to
black as various gods of ill fortune cackle maniacally]

Fellow Authors, please ask me before you:
-Get me involved with someone (*snicker* Yeah, like that's happening...)
-Have me kill/maim anybody
-Have me dress up like a cowboy and dance the merengue while playing the
 harpsihord
-Do anything to me that would be paticularly humiliating

Fellow Authors, please do not:
-Kill me.
-Have me do drugs/drink alcohol/smoke
-Have me torture small woodland creatures. Only ones over 90 lbs.
-Chain me to the front of the house, along with a sign saying "Go back from
 whence ye came", to discourage crashers