][ LURKER HAS JOINED THE PARTY AS A GUEST

Name: The Eternal Lost Lurker Sex: M Physical Age: Indeterminable True Age: 22
Also Goes By: Lurker, Lurk, ELL
Height: 5'11"	Weight: Sumo	Eyes: One	Hair: Black and Untamed

Primary Goal(s):

-to transcend the boundaries between my online self and my RL self
-to have one hell of a good time
-to just hang out with some like-minded folks

Secondary Goal(s):

-to ogle and leer at any and all cute girls
-to perpetuate total sheer wackiness

Strengths/Abilities:
-Writing
-Extreme tolerance for weirdness (Cannot be fazed by anything short of 
 End of Evangelion)
-Ability to eat damn near any fattening food and not care what it does to him
-Extreme pain threshold
-Overactive imagination
-Ability to squeeze through impossibly tight spaces despite his bulk

Weaknesses/Quirks:
-Perverse mindset
-Tendency to execute devastating verbal attacks when pissed off
-Low stamina, not able to be very physically active
-Hair-trigger temper
-Extremely allergic to most types of nut (esp. cashews and peanuts)
-Dozes off a lot
-Bumps into things on his right side a lot
-Swears a lot
-Tendency to randomly shout bizarre, off-the-wall comments for no 
 particular reason (in particular, howls 'Scrooooo!' a lot, and makes
 sudden rants about sexual misconduct involving pot roast)

Likes:
-Anime
-Fanfics
-Cute girls
-Hentai stuff
-Food
-Dr. Pepper, root beer, and grape soda
-Video games
-Chihuahuas
-Music (except opera and modern country)
-Pokemon

Dislikes:
-Stupidity
-Anal-retentiveness
-'Salads' which are not salad (ie coleslaw, potato salad)
-Religious intolerance
-Noisy car alarms
-Marilyn Manson


Background:

After coping with disastrous health for 22 years, Lurker hasn't had 
many opportunities to just get out and have a good time. After hearing of
the Improparty, however, he decided 'eh, what the hell', sent away for a
custom-built Chariot of Cheese, hitched it to a pack of chihuahuas, and
headed off to party. He intends to inflict his own brand of wackiness on 
the party, while enjoying hanging out with other writers, and in general 
having a good time.

Fellow Authors, please ask me before you:
-Have me sit on anyone
-Eat my chariot
-Have me get drunk
-Have me smoke
-Have me actually screw a pot roast
-Have me mercilessly grope anyone

Fellow Authors, please do not:
-Have me make lewd comments about anyone
-Have me do drugs
-Have me die
-Kill any chihuahuas
-Deliberately piss me off
-Make fun of my physical condition and/or appearance. We're 
 supposed to be above that sort of nonsense.