---------------------------------------------------------
    Do Gooders
    (The Proactive Teen Superhero Team
     With No X Anywhere In Their Title)

    Episode 23:
    Answers and Questions!  How confusing can all this get?

    Written by Steven Scougall
    Original Do-Gooders concept by Stefan Gagne, 1998

    Thanks must go to Jonatan Streith for prereading,
    providing some ideas, and pointing out really stupid
    mistakes.  Thanks Jonatan!
   ---------------------------------------------------------

Tejina, Hanaki, and Becky were walking back to the Nakao household.  
With them was the new greenhaired woman who had revealed herself to be 
Hanaki's previously-thought-to-be-missing mother.  Only, she was so 
youthful looking she looked more like Hanaki and Tejina's older 
sister.  Tejina was a bit jealous about that.

They walked along the sidewalk in an embarrassed silence for a few 
minutes, nobody quite sure how to start a conversation they knew 
they'd have to have but couldn't quite nerve themselves to start.  
Tejina was the one to finally break the ice.  She cleared her throat 
selfconsciously, instantly attracting the attention of the other 
three.  She gulped nervously and plunged into the murky depths of 
conversation.

"Uh... Shirokaze-san, wasn't it?"

The greenhaired woman nodded her head.  "Indeed it is, Tejina-chan."

"And you're my natural mother?"

"Indeed I am, Tejina-chan," said the woman.  "It'd be nice, but you 
don't have to suddenly start calling me 'Mum' if you don't want to.  
You can start with calling me 'Ayame', or possibly even 'Shirokaze-
san' if you wish."

Tejina decided to ignore the "-chan" coming from a complete stranger.  
Besides, this woman *was* her natural mother so there was nothing 
wrong with her calling Tejina "-chan".  Probably.  This led Tejina to 
start thinking about what kind of woman puts up one of a pair of twins 
up for adoption.

"Um... Ayame, would you mind telling me-"

"Why I put you up for adoption?"

"Well, that too, but mainly just what's happening?" she asked.  "I've 
no idea what's going on anymore."

"I would not be surprised, my dear."  Ayame sighed, and looked 
sideways at the reader.  "I would not be surprised if they did not 
know what's going on either."

"Who?"

"Never mind.  So, just what has my ingrate daughter Hanaki told you?"

Tejina was unsure how much to say about the whole Sailor business.  If 
Hanaki's story was to be believed, Ayame was the incarnation of the 
Queen, but it seemed that nothing Hanaki said could be trusted.  She 
might, like Tejina, have had to keep it a secret from her family.  At 
this point a voice in the back of her head cut in and said she'd never 
worked very hard at keeping her Sailor Delight identity secret anyway.  
She ignored it.

After a moment or two of further thought, she finally settled with 
"That you mysteriously disappeared.  And that she's been looking for 
you ever since."

The greenhaired woman arched a perfectly kept also green eyebrow at 
Tejina.  "She didn't perhaps mention anything about the distant past, 
Sailor Delight?"

So this woman knew about that also.  That would make things a bit 
easier.

"Um, yes, she did.  She said that the soul of Princess Amore somehow 
split in two and she and I are the two halves of that soul.  
Explaining why we're twins."

Ayame sighed, and addressed the girl that was definitely her daughter.  
"Hanaki, we will have to do something about this tendency to lie of 
yours."  Without waiting for an answer, she turned her attention back 
to Tejina.  "Tejina-chan, that is most definitely not correct.  I will 
explain further, but first of all I would like you to consider your 
friend Sailor Rapture here."

Becky started.  "You know who I am?"

"Dear, I am the reincarnation of the Queen of the Kingdom of Delight.  
I am able to instantly recognise any of the Sailors.  So yes, I do 
know that you're Sailor Rapture.  Anyway.  You've probably noticed 
that Sailor Delight's transformation involves the use of a magic rod, 
and that Sailor Rapture's involves no magical artifacts of any kind."

"Hey yeah, that's right," said Tejina.

The greenhaired woman nodded sagely and continued on with her 
exposition.  "In addition, Bliss' transformation sequence involves a 
song and dance sequence with Pepper."

"I'd like to see that," said Becky with an evil grin.

"It's the stupidest and most embarrassing thing ever," muttered 
Hanaki.

Ayame ignored the comments and continued on.  "I understand you've 
encountered Joy as well, and her transformation sequence requires a 
magical brooch."

This last threw Tejina for a loop.  "She does?"

"Aki doesn't have a magical brooch," commented Becky.

"What?  ...no matter," continued the woman, without waiting for an 
answer.  "She will get it eventually, or Charles will wish he'd never 
been hatched."  She paused, trying to remember what the point of this 
latest round of exposition had been.  "Oh yes.  In any case, I was 
going to explain about the true story about you and Hanaki."

"I wondered when she'd get around to that," muttered Becky.

"Quiet dear, I'm expositing."  The group turned the final corner, and 
less than a hundred meters away was Tejina's home.  Less than a meter 
away was the countenance of Agent V, Becky's father.

There was complete silence for a few moments as V stared at his 
daughter, and Becky stared back, looking much like a deer does in the 
glare of an oncoming truck's headlights.

The silence was broken by Becky's comment of 
"SorryguysgottagoI'llseeyoutomorrowatschoolbyyyyyyeee!" as she started 
running.

"You've been aiding and abetting a known grounding-breaker!" shouted 
V, waving a finger in admonishment.  "I'll have your parents ground 
you until you're thirty!"

"But I'm not -" started Ayame.

V ignored her and took a communicator from his jacket pocket and spoke 
quickly into it.  "Target sighted, last seen running down... er... 
stupid Japanese street naming system, not naming all their roads."  He 
paused as a voice shouted back at him from the communicator.  "Never 
mind that, she's getting away!  Current position two hundred meters 
south-west from the Nakaos' place, and accelerating westwards!  I'll 
keep you posted, dear!"  With that, he cleared a postbox from a 
standing start and sprinted after his errant daughter.

Hanaki was really improving her dead goldfish impression.  In 
comparison, her mother merely arched a perfect eyebrow in the 
direction Becky and V had run.

Tejina sighed, and indicated her house.  "Anyway, that's my house over 
there, so you'll probably have to explain sometime later when we have 
more time."

"No, I must explain to you as soon as possible, and clear up any 
confusion Hanaki may have wrought.  You can explain to Sailor Rapture 
later.  But for now we must brave the gauntlet of your adoptive 
parents' house."

"Not much of a gauntlet," muttered Tejina.

She was correct in this estimation.  As they came in the front door, 
Tejina's adoptive parents took one look at the greenhaired woman and -

"Shirokaze-san?" gasped her father.  Her mother said nothing, as she 
was indulging in the suddenly popular practice of looking like a 
stunned fish.

"Ah, so you *do* remember me," said Ayame.

"Quick!  Lock up the valuables!  Lock up Eiji!  Shred everything!" 
bellowed her father, and charged from the room, dragging his wife 
behind him.

Hanaki practised her stunned fish impression again.  Ayame merely 
arched the other eyebrow.

"What was that all about?" asked Tejina.

"It relates back to when they adopted you, of course," said Ayame.  
"It doesn't matter.  In any case, we don't have to worry about them 
getting in the way."

"They'll be back with contracts to sign with blood," said Hanaki 
darkly.

"Dear, you didn't!"

"Even if they are, we have some time while they draw up the 
contracts," said Tejina.  "Let's go to my room and finish our earlier 
discussion."

The three went upstairs and settled themselves in Tejina's room.  
Ayame leaned back in the deskchair and looked at Tejina.

"Alright, where were we?"

"Hanaki and I aren't two halves of Amore," Tejina prompted.

"That's right.  In fact, *you* are the reincarnation of Amore and 
Hanaki is the reincarnation of Amore's twin Felice."

Tejina developed sweatdrops on each pigtail.  "Why didn't you just say 
that in the first place?"

"The different transformation sequences are important background to 
the real story of the Crystal Millenium's Sailor team.  Consider that 
if the system had been designed from the start you'd all probably 
transform the same way and have just one cute animal mascot."

With the requisite comic timing, Daisy chose this moment to stagger in 
and look up at the three women in the room.

"Oh great", she lisped, "Now 'm sheeing shexshtuple, not double."  
Daisy took a staggering step, came down on her own paw, toppled over, 
and started snoring, all four paws in the air.

The greenhaired woman tinysweated.  "Well, perhaps not so cute after 
all.  I honestly don't know what we were thinking when we elevated the 
cook's cat to Magical Advisor status."

"She's a cook's cat?"

"And Rover was a farmer's sheepdog, Charles was a lunatic 
philosopher's pet, and Pepper was the pet of the ditziest member of 
the Royal Family."

"I'm starting to see a pattern here..." said Tejina.  "Why-"

"Did we choose such lowly and pathetic animals to be the advisors to 
our frontline defence team?  We chose animals that our enemies would 
never even think of looking for."  She allowed herself a smug smile.  
"It worked, too.  Well, most of the time.  The Darkverse eventually 
found them out.  But I've digressed again."

"You've done that a lot, Mum," said Hanaki.

"Quiet dear, I'm trying to exposit here."

"And getting interrupted a lot."

"No thanks to you, dear.  Please be quiet.  Now, where was I?"

"That if we were a 'real' team we'd all transform the same way and 
have just one animal mascot instead of the four we have already."

"That's right.  Early on, we recognised the potential of a generation 
of the Kingdom of Delight's princesses.  They were all raised 
separately, as far away as possible from each other, as defenders of 
the kingdom - hence the different animal advisors, transformation 
sequences, magical powers, and so on.  We wanted them as different as 
possible so that enemies would find fighting them as difficult as 
possible.  It seemed to work, though for some reason the costumes were 
all similar.

"But one day we found we that individual soldiers weren't quite 
enough.  Master Chiang, one of the Advisors to the Royal Court, 
suggested that we form a team from the individual Sailors.  So, with 
his guidance, we gathered together all the Sailors from the corners of 
the Kingdom and assembled them into a team.  With the new Sailor Team 
we were able to hold off our various enemies for many years."

"'Sailor Team'?" asked Tejina, incredulous.  "That is *such* a stupid 
name..."

Ayame had the grace to look embarrassed.  "Well... truth be told, it 
was all we could think of at the time, and had more things to worry 
about than the name.  Anyway, we had the new Sailor Team and were able 
to hold off the various enemies of the Kingdom for a while.  But our 
enemies were growing stronger as well, and eventually the Darkverse 
had the bright idea of forming an uneasy alliance with some of our 
other enemies, and their total force was too much for us.  Even with 
the Sailor Team working together to the best of their ability, the 
Darkverse overran the kingdom and destroyed it.

"Since then, throughout the ages, whenever danger looms on the 
horizon, the Sailors have been resurrected in order to deal with the 
coming danger."

"This feels like an incredibly cliched anime," Tejina muttered to 
herself.

"In any case," said Ayame, glancing sideways at the readers, "I do 
believe this is sufficient enough explanation for them."

"For who?" asked Tejina, confused.

"Never mind, dear."

   *   *   *

Charity Darkness Vengeance was worried.  There seemed to be something 
wrong with time.  During their time in the pygmies' village, she had 
noticed that the newspapers in their main store had been dated only 
three days after their departure on the cruise.  Yet she had just 
spent four very pleasant weeks with Nemesis.  So seeing the newspapers 
raised a couple of worrying questions.

The first was why on earth a forgotten pygmy village in the middle of 
nowhere received newspapers.  The chief had responded with "pygmy 
villages in the middle of nowhere have a right to know what's going on 
in the world around them too, you know."

But that was just a minor question.  Much more worrying was that the 
newspapers were three and a half weeks behind.  Now either the pygmies 
were very very behind in getting their news, or something was going 
wrong with time.

She had quickly eliminated the first possibility, by the simple 
expedient of going into the store and asking the shopowner about it.  
He had became quite aggressive with her implication and rudely 
answered her question, for which he had spent the next five minutes 
thinking he was a dragonfly.  But she had ascertained that, despite 
the fact this village was in the middle of nowhere and had no visible 
means of communication with the outside world, he was only a day 
behind the rest of the world.

Which meant that something nefarious was going on.

Damn.

If anyone was going to be nefarious around here, she thought darkly, 
then it was going to be her, or Nemesis-chan, or both of them.  There 
was no way she was going to let herself and Nemesis-chan be the victim 
of nefariety.

And then she had felt the magic power of the pygmies' Artifact of the 
Morning.  Her being the dark and evil queen of the Darkverse, there 
was only one course of action available to her.

Which had eventually led to the current situation of her and Nemesis 
in a boat, Nemesis rowing mightily to escape the pygmy warriors after 
them.  Though that wasn't quite how he understood the situation.

"My, these pygmy admirers of mine seem determined to prolong this 
goodbye as long as possible," he commented, as he gave another mighty 
heave on the oars.  "Such quaint farewell customs, too, with so much 
spear waving and shouting and beating of drums and such.  You'd almost 
think they didn't like us anymore."

She hadn't yet told Nemesis-chan just how she'd come into possession 
of the Artifact of the Morning yet.  She was a bit worried about that, 
and worried about being worried about it.  It was almost as if she was 
developing a conscience.  A dark and evil queen developing a 
conscience?  It just wouldn't do.

An arrow splashed into the water beside them.  It appeared to have a 
piece of bark tied to it with grass;  Charity fished the arrow out of 
the water and retrieved the bark.  As she thought, the pygmies had 
written a "give the Artifact back!" message on it.  Well, that wasn't 
exactly what they'd written, but it was close enough.

"They shoot arrows with farewell messages too!" exclaimed Nemesis.  
"Amazing!  What have they written, Charity-chan?"

"That they wish us godspeed and advise us to row faster if we wish to 
get to Tokyo within the next couple of days," she lied smoothly.  
Which wasn't all that smoothly, for when she had lied in the past, she 
usually broke into insane laughter, or looked shifty, and so on.  
Villyn, having had similarly problems with telling falsehoods, didn't 
notice her guilty look, though.

"I'm already rowing as fast as I can, though, Charity-chan."

"Oh, Nemesis-chan," she simpered, "I'm *sure* you could row faster."

"Tell you what," he said, "I'll use the propeller attachment in my 
armour to propel us."

She boggled at him.  "You have a propeller in your armour?"

"Why yes, I do.  You never know when a propeller might come in handy."  
So saying, he lifted his hands from the oars for a moment, lifted a 
flap on the inside of his armour's neckpiece, and pressed a button 
that was revealed.

Charity watched the now fast approaching pygmy warriors with concern.  
This concern turned into amazement as a folded-up propeller emerged 
from the back of his armour, assembled itself, and at the touch of a 
few more buttons in his neckpiece, lowered itself into the water.  The 
pygmy warriors saw this happening and let off a last ditch burst of 
speed and volley of arrows, and then, with a final button press, the 
propeller whirred into action, shooting their little boat forwards at 
great speed.

"My, Nemesis-chan," she said, "you're certainly full of surprises."

"I have my armour fully prepared for as many things as I could think 
of, Charity-chan," he said proudly.  "It has a tape deck, miniature 
interdimensional gate opener, a radio, the propeller attachment you 
see me using right now, the compartment the pygmies' gift is in, and 
much more besides."

"Incredible," she breathed, looking romantically into his eyes.  She 
moved to the back of the boat and closer to him...

...without considering the need for a counterweight in the front of 
the boat.  The boat started to list backwards.  With a frightened 
'eep' she scrambled for the front, but was too late - the boat tipped 
over, plunging them both into the water.

   *   *   *

"No, you fools, you should turn off that propeller first!" shouted 
Baron Stagner von Carrlson of the Kingdom of Obscurity, thumping the 
table with his fist.  "Do you want to cut yourself to ribbons?"

The customers in the kissaten studiously ignored the mysterious 
becloaked customer ranting at his cup of coffee.

   *   *   *

"AAAAAAAH!" shrieked Charity as the two spun crazily through the 
water, the sound of their boat becoming a shredded boat preying on her 
mind.  "Nemesis-chan!  The propeller!  Turn off the propeller!  It's 
going to slice us to bits!"

"I can't, Charity-chan!" he bellowed.  "With its weight and the weight 
of everything built into it, this armour will sink like a rock!  The 
propeller's the only thing keeping me afloat!"

"There's only thing you can do, then," she said, not noticing an arrow 
splash into the water a few meters away from her.  "You must get out 
of the armour!"

Nemesis paused, then opened his mouth to say something.

"You're not going to say you can't leave it behind, are you?"

"No," he said, quickly revising what he was going to say.  "That's 
quite a good idea.  It's just that..."

"What?"

"This armour is designed so I can get out of it only on land, you 
see."

She tinysweated, but considering their situation, not for long.

   *   *   *

"This is unbelievable," muttered Esjie.  "They've spent five minutes 
in the open sea, surrounded by sharks, being shot at by fearsome pygmy 
warriors, going round and round in circles, and with a giant propeller 
spinning very fast just underneath their feet, and they're still alive 
and in one piece."

"Truly they have the luck of the gods," said his viewing companion 
with a smirk on his face.

"I will have no insolence from you," said Esjie.

"You would do [well] to remember just [who] I am," said his guest in 
sharp and mystical tones.

Esjie boggled at his guest.  "The Brackets of Power?!"

"The Brackets of Power indeed."

Esjie's brilliant mind put two and two together a few times, added it 
all up, and came up with sixteen.  Oh, and worked out the mystery of 
his guest being able to use the Brackets of Power as well.  "But of 
course," he murmured.  "Considering where you arrived from."

"Indeed."  His guest suddenly looked puzzled.  "I have a sudden 
craving for tea."

"You too?"

"You do as well.  Bizarre.  I wonder why?"

   *   *   *

The Baron stared into his tea, at the scene playing out in one of the 
many throne rooms in the Darkverse palace.

"My god..." he said.  "He can use the Brackets of Power too!?"

"Would you please not shout that loud?" asked the waitress.  "The 
other customers are complaining."

"So sorry, miss," replied the Baron, looking up at her and as a result 
missed Esjie looking up at the precise angle that allowed him to 
seemingly stare out of the tea.  He also missed Esjie looking puzzled 
and returning to evil plotting with whoever his guest was.  "[Please] 
excuse me."

The waitress blinked, looked confused for a moment, said "Certainly, 
sir," and backed away.

The Baron went back to looking at his coffee, and saw that Villyn had 
managed to adjust the propeller so that it was well behind him and 
angled down slightly, and was now speeding through the water towards 
Japan.  Charity was sitting on one of his shoulder pads and resting 
her feet in the kitchen sink attachment of his armour, and enjoying 
the wind in her hair.

"Ah, I see he has a clue after all."

   *   *   *

So... that fool was actually being sensible for once.  Esjie ground 
his teeth and considered how to get around this.  For once back in 
civilisation, the Queen would no doubt realise that there had been a 
timewarping spell in effect, and would want to do something about it.  
No doubt she would be coming *right* here and would then deal with 
Esjie's treachery in an extremely unpleasant manner.  With spikes.  He 
used his startlingly white handkerchief to mop his brow as he quickly 
considered his options.

"Nervous, Esjie?" asked his guest, grinning.  "Once she gets back to 
civilisation, it won't be long before she learns of your coup.  She's 
been Dark Queen much longer than you've been a general here.  Tell me, 
Esjie, what do you think of your chances?"

"That is ENOUGH from you.  I may have been a general here for a 
comparatively short time, but I have progressed much faster and much 
further than you or anyone could imagine.  Let the Queen come and 
challenge me if she wishes.  We shall see who is the stronger and more 
fit to rule this place."

His guest arched an eyebrow at him.  "I thought your intention was to 
conquer Earth, not the Darkverse.  Compromising your plans that much 
already?"

Teaming up with this insolent idiot had probably been a mistake, but 
Esjie was damned if he was going to admit that, even to himself.

"I shall conquer the Darkverse and *then* Earth!" he proclaimed.  
"With the incredible power of the soon to resume Barney initiative, 
ANYTHING is possible!  BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"  He then realised 
he'd slipped into ranting and megalomaniacal laughter again, and 
quickly stopped.

   - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = -

            I N T E R M I S S I O N

Are you enjoying the story so far?  If so, why not check out the 
author's other stories, and even his rather rough attempts at art, at 
his website?  The URL is -

*WHACK*

Editor:  (Casually wielding a mallet in one hand while hauling the now 
unconscious author off stage with the other)  Please excuse us.  I'll 
get this egotistical self-plugging idiot back to writing the story as 
soon as he recovers.

(As the editor disappears from stage, it is possible to hear him 
shouting insults at the author, water splashing, and the editor 
generally giving the author a hard time, as editors are wont to do.)

     E N D   O F   I N T E R M I S S I O N

   - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = -

In what was starting to become a tradition, the 'gang' (that is, 
Tejina, Matsuro, Kireiko, Becky, Aki, and occasionally Keiko) was 
sitting under a shady tree during lunchtime, discussing recent events, 
working out what to do next, one-upping each other, and complaining 
about the stupidity of parents.

The main point of interest today was the story that Ayame had told 
Tejina about the history of the Sailor Team of the Kingdom of Delight.

"That story is completely and utterly whacked," was Matsuro's comment.

"This from the guy who says his dead mother and aunt have come to 
stay," said Kireiko.

"Well they have, and Tejina's story is completely and utterly 
whacked."

All present (except for Keiko) gave Matsuro their best "You're Weird" 
look, something they'd been able to practice quite a lot lately.  
Keiko instead glared at everybody else.  Matsuro had an expression of 
affected bishounen disinterest and was completely ignoring the various 
looks being exchanged around him.

Becky was the first to break the silence.  "It is NOT whacked!  It's 
cool!  It's just like Sailor Moon!  We've even got a Sailor Pluto type 
now!"

"Anime otaku," muttered Matsuro, in the same tones that in another 
country one might mutter "Damn Yankee."

Becky either didn't hear this or chose not to hear it.  "So anyway, 
Tej, what's happening with Hanaki now?"

"Her mother knows more legalese than both my parents do combined, and 
was able to null the contracts Hanaki was going to enter into with my 
parents.  How I have no idea.  Anyway, she says she's now going to 
keep a very stern eye on Hanaki."

"And it's very irritating indeed," came a very familiar voice.  After 
all, it was almost exactly the same as Tejina's, and the person it 
came from looked a lot like Tejina.  Except for the purple hair 
colour.

The group boggled at the new arrival as one.  "HANAKI?!?"

"Yep!  The one and only!"

After the initial shock, the stares of amazement and surprise turned 
mostly into those of interest.  Well, except for Tejina's, which 
became a look of anger.

"But what on earth are you doing HERE?" she complained.

"Mum decided that the one bit of good your mother arranged was 
enrolling me here at this school."

"What about the school you were at before?"

"She said this place was better."

"Uh-huh," said Aki.  "Excuse me if I don't completely believe you;  
after all, your reputation for telling the truth isn't the best."

Hanaki flushed angrily, and produced a student ID card from her purse.  
"See?  I *am* a student here."

"Oh," said Aki.  "Sorry."

"Let me see that," said Becky, as her mind switched over to Agent BA-3 
mode, and swiped the card from Hanaki's hand.

"HEY!" Hanaki complained.  "Give that back!"

Becky was scrutinising the card very closely with a magnifying glass, 
comparing it to her own ID card.  After a minute, she grudgingly 
handed Hanaki's card back.  "It looks completely legit," she told the 
others.

"Uh... right," said Tejina.

Hanaki smiled frostily at Becky.  "*So* glad I meet with your 
approval."

   *   *   *

The Darkverse was in uproar.

Well, not really.  For the most part, it went on just as it always 
did.  The denizens denizened, the workers worked, the more monstrous 
youmas went around inadvertently frightening themselves whenever they 
looked into reflective surfaces (sometimes their own skin), guards 
guarded, soldiers sat around playing cards, and publicans ran their 
pubs.

But were any of them to know of the sudden power vacuum at the top of 
the hierarchy and the political infighting going on, the denizens (who 
were generally too dark, evil and youma-ish to be called citizens) 
would have been in uproar.

Considering just how ugly and mean-minded some of them were, this was 
probably a Good Thing.

Part of the uproar-that-wasn't was now taking place.  In a small 
undistinguished room in the palace, the four High Generals were having 
an emergency meeting.

"Man, Esjie is aiming WAY too high," said Ayesse.  "When the Queen 
gets back she's going to have a real huge hissy fit.  I wouldn't want 
to be too close when that happens."

Sohkoh nodded, and fingered his yo-yo, which in his hands could became 
a deadly weapon.  "Definitely not.  I want to be several kilometers 
away at least, myself."

"But Esjie's so scary," said Malaise.  "If we don't join his side then 
he could turn nasty on us."

The fourth, as yet unnamed High General, broke in at this point.  "Are 
we not the Darkverse's four High Generals?  Second in power only to 
Esjie and the Queen herself?"

"That's third in power... isn't it?" asked Malaise.

Ayesse and Sohkoh ignored Malaise.

"Lessente, are you advising we directly rebel against Esjie?  That's 
real heavy, man."

Lessente, the now named fourth High General, glowered at the other 
three.  "It is our duty to the Queen!  As she is not here to deal with 
Esjie herself, we MUST fight!  I do not believe you three wish not to 
get involved!"

"Oh, I don't like what's going on," said Malaise, "but what can we do?  
Do you have a plan?"

"Well... that is...  Very well then, I don't," said Lessente.  "But I 
still think we should do something!  We are the four High Generals!  
We each command dozens of youma!"

"Esjie could simply override our orders," Sohkoh pointed out.  "And he 
commands hundreds - no, thousands more than we do combined.  Could you 
devise a plan that accounts for that?"

Malaise cut in.  "Hey, guys?  The Astrologer Vuudu dropped in to see 
me and he says he has a plan.  He said he'd get in contact later."

Lessente snorted.  "So now we place our future in a simple 
astrologer."

"He *is* a full General, you know," said Ayesse.  "He just ain't High 
like us."

"And he's just so gorgeous!" squealed Malaise.

The other three looked nervous and edged slightly away from the 
androgynous High General.  She/he was looking dreamily into space and 
so didn't notice.

"Well, that's just great, dudes.  Do we just wait and see what the 
Vuud is up to, then?"

"'The Vuud'?" asked Lessente.

"Y'know, Vuudu.  Do we just wait and see what he gets up to, then?"

"Yeah!" said Malaise.

"In absence of any other plan being put forward," started Sohkoh, 
"that is exactly what we shall do."

Lessente buried his face in his hands.

   *   *   *

"Hey wait, you can't do this to me!" shouted Lessente.  "You can't end 
the section with us reaching such an unsatisfactory conclusion!"

Tough.  Live with it, fella.

   *   *   *

The two Cthulu operatives crouched next to each other in fear as a 
searchlight swept over the bush they were hiding underneath, and 
breathed a sigh of relief as it passed on.

It had seemed quite simple at first.  They had been told to "go get 
Jodi Foster."  So, being quite direct thinking Cthulu cult operatives, 
and having completely forgotten Brother Maynard's detailed plan, upon 
arrival in the USA they had looked up every single 'Foster' in every 
single phonebook they could find and called them up.  After receiving 
many many replies on the general lines of "no" to the question "Are 
you the Jodi Foster in the movies" and running up a huge phone bill, 
they decided on a new approach.  They would actually locate her house 
and nab her from there.

This hadn't been easy, and was made even harder by the fact they were 
wanted by the police for not paying the phone bill.

So far, they hadn't made it out of the hotel grounds yet.  But what 
was that to a pair of Cthulu cultists armed with Hello Cthulu dolls?  
Quite a lot, apparently.  But somehow, they thought, they would 
prevail.

   *   *   *

Matsuro, dreading what was to come, opened the door to his flat.  No 
visions greeted him - his mother and aunt must have been out 
somewhere, perhaps hanging around a seance session.  He breathed a 
sigh of relief.

He then noticed that things had been drastically altered and changed 
around by the dwarves.  Whereas before it had been an average small 
Japanese flat that was large enough for one person, it now resembled a 
large Valhallic hall.  In exactly the same amount of space - an 
impressive trick of carpentry, that.  He just knew that his landlord 
wouldn't see it that way, though.

One of the dwarves - was it Balin?  Dalin?  He couldn't tell - looked 
up from their complex looking card game at him, took a swig from a 
large steaming stein, and waved.

"Hi!  Hope you like the place.  We think it's much better this way."

"I'm sure you do," he said in his best disinterested bishounen way.  
"Just out of interest, could you put it back the way it was?"

"Weeell, yes, we could, but don't you think it's much better like 
this?"

Matsuro declined to comment and went to sit at his desk and do some 
schoolwork.

Barely a minute had passed before his mother, sounding as eerie as 
possible, moaned at him.

"Matsuro, you must... what the hell happened here?"

"Hi mum," he said, without looking around.  "The dwarves happened.  
Incidentally, I'm in Tokyo, have joined the band, have the Sword of 
Duality, aren't letting the dwarves run away with it, and am 
considering the situation with Keiko.  Got anything else to say?"

The dwarves looked at him with confusion.  "Hey boss, who are you 
talking to?"

"My mother," he said shortly, and put down his pen.

They gave him their best "You're Weird" looks.  He ignored them, and 
turned to his mother.

As he completed the turn, the vision kicked fully in, with small 
purple elephants writing with purple ink on purple scrolls flying 
around his head and singing "Yellow Submarine".  (Sorry, did you think 
they'd be singing something else?)  His mother appeared before him on 
an upside down cross hanging from the ceiling, eye to inverted eye, 
and in the background icebergs erupted, mighty trees floated 
dangerously through the water, and volcanoes took root in giant 
forests and sprouted leaves.

"Matsuro, you must avoid the Tokyo Tower, until the time is right, 
whereupon it shall become the meeting place."

This was new, but not all that surprising.  Half the city's mystical 
happenings seemed to occur at the Tokyo Tower.  "Meeting place for 
what?  And what was all that stuff about the dragons and infinite 
stakes and everything you said before?"

"Remember Matsuro, you are the Chick, and the world is the Egg.  When 
the dragons surface your destiny shall arise.  Now rise, young boy, 
rise to the heavens like a cruel angel!"  The cross started to spin 
around wildly and recede into ceiling as his mother started to explode 
messily.

"And don't forget about the grandchildren!" she called just before her 
head exploded too.

Well, his visions seemed to mostly back to normal.  He just hoped his 
mother wouldn't talk about grandchildren every single time.

   *   *   *

Meanwhile...

Well, sort of meanwhile.  Because what seemed to the rest of the world 
like only a couple of hours was bit over half-a-day for Villyn and 
Queen Charity.  And half a day is an incredibly long time to be 
zooming along in the water either in a suit of armour or sitting on 
it.  One develops quite severe cramp, for example.  And, were his 
armour rustable, rust would definitely be a problem.

But it suffices to say that was about to happen to them was a sort of 
'meanwhile'.

Queen Charity squinted through the telescope, and pointed in the only 
way she knew how, which was dramatically.  "Nemesis-chan!  Look!  
Land!"

"Land?  Where?"

She held the telescope over his eye and pointed it in roughly the 
right direction.

"Why, Charity-chan, so it is!  Do you think it's Japan?"

"Well, we have been travelling in roughly the correct direction - 
assuming, of course, that the pygmy village is where we think it is."

"It's going to be a shame to go off vacation," he sighed.  "Still," he 
continued, looking up at Charity with his endearing goofy grin, "it's 
been an absolutely wonderful few weeks with you, Charity-chan."

"Really, Nemesis-chan?"

"Oh yes," he said, looking deep into her eyes, "it has.  Despite all 
the unexpected happenings and the way in which we're heading back to 
Tokyo, doing it all with you has made it worthwhile."

There was a pause.

"Say, Charity-chan?"

"Yes?"

"When we get back to dry land and can walk around normally and so on, 
would you..."

Her pulse quickened.  He wasn't asking what she thought he was about 
to ask, was he?  "Would I what, Nemesis-chan?"

"Er... that is..."

He certainly seemed to be.  Her breath caught in her throat.

"Wouldyouconquertheworldwithme?"

There was a brief moment while she ran this past her mind a couple of 
times, slowing it down.  Once she'd worked out what he'd asked, 
though, she gave a squeal of delight, leaned over and hugged his head 
as much as she could.  "Oh, Nemesis-chan, that sounds like a wonderful 
idea!"

"Charity-chan!  I can't see!"

   *   *   *

On land...

To be specific, in a military-style bureau whose mission was to repel 
invasions of Japan from sea.  There was a blip from his instruments, 
and one of the men on the deep-sea-scanning instruments peered closely 
at one of his readouts.  He adjusted the controls slightly and looked 
even closer at the readout...  No doubt about it, there was something 
out there, coming in very quickly.

"Sir!  There's something coming in from the Pacific!  Incredibly 
fast!"

"WHAAAAAT?"  His commanding chief rushed over and peered closely at 
the man's readouts.  "WHERE?"

"Right there!  From the south-east, heading straight for Tokyo!"

His commanding chief looked at the measure of the unidentified 
incoming object's speed and went green.  "That's an impossible speed!"

"But it's how fast they're going, sir."

"Any idea what it could be?"

"It's too small and too fast to match anything we've ever encountered 
sir!  It's completely new!  We have no idea how to deal with it!"

"GO TO RED ALERT!" shouted the commanding chief.  Lights switched over 
to red, the klaxons started sounding, all the exits were sealed and 
the doomsayers started running around waving "The end of the world is 
nigh" placards.

"Shoot it!  Shoot it!  Quick, tell the closest warship to fire a 
torpedo!"

   *   *   *

"NEMESIS-CHAN!  A TORPEDO!  COMING RIGHT AT US!"

"What?  Where?"

"Steer to the left NOW!"

Villyn furiously tapped buttons on his neckpiece and the two veered 
sharply to the left, Charity just managing to hang on.  Just in time, 
too - the torpedo swished by the two, on into the deep sea, and 
eventually blew up a shark that was about to eat the last of an 
incredibly endangered species of deep sea fish.

"How come they're shooting at us?  When I'm Evil Overlord of the 
world, I'll have them tossed into the gorilla pit!"

"My thoughts exactly," said Charity.

   *   *   *

"We... missed?  HOW COULD WE MISS!?  Quick, fire another!"

"We can't!  They're too close!"

"Call the army!  Send in the tanks!"

"Hey, that's odd," said the junior lieutenant that had discovered the 
incoming object.

"What's odd?" asked his chief.

"Now that it's getting closer, it's slowing down.  Yes...  Now it's 
even slow enough to get a decent lock on it."

"Get me a visual of it RIGHT AWAY!" demanded the commanding chief.

The lieutenant worked the controls, and in a few moments an image 
popped up on the large screen that filled an entire wall of the room.  
It was an image of a man in armour half submerged in the water, and a 
woman in a black dress sitting on one of his shoulder pads, her feet 
resting on a kitchen sink that somehow extended from the man's armour.  
The junior lieutenant worked the controls again and the visual 
extended to include underwater, which showed that a large propeller 
extending from the lower back of the man's armour was propelling them 
through the water.

There was a shocked silence.  Then an uneasy silence.  Mumblings.  A 
few muffled snorts.  One of the more junior females tried to stifle a 
giggle.  This was the signal for the bureau headquarters to fall into 
raucous laughter.

Except for the commanding chief, who was looking redder than Rudolph's 
nose.

"Do you want me to belay the order for the tanks, sir?" gasped the 
junior lieutenant through his laughter.

"Right away, Takamura.  While you're at it, turn off that red alert 
and send someone along to their estimated point of landing, why don't 
you."

"Right away, sir."

   *   *   *

"Ah, finally, land!" exclaimed Villyn, stamping his armoured feet 
lovingly on the shore, and stretching his cramped body.  "You don't 
know how much you miss it until you spend half a day zipping through 
the water with nothing to sit on!"

The queen was similarly stretching and trying to assuage her cramps.  
Villyn tried not to stare.  After all, it wouldn't be gentlemanly.

"Anyway," she said, "now that we're finally out of the water, can you 
let me have a look at the present the pygmies gave to us?"

"Why certainly, my lady!"  He lifted a flap on a gauntlet, exposing a 
row of buttons, pressed one of them, and a compartment in the lower 
right of the abdominal plate of his armour squeaked open.  "Hmm, I'm 
going to have to get that oiled," he mused.

Within the compartment was a lot of seawater and the Artifact of the 
Morning.  He fished it out and handed it to Queen Charity.

Charity hated what she was about to do, but didn't see any way out of 
it.  As she took the Artifact from him, she bugged her eyes and opened 
her mouth in the best amazement she could fake (which wasn't really 
that much, but it was enough to fool Villyn), and stared at the holy 
item.

"Why, Charity-chan, is something the matter?"

"This statue!  I don't know why I didn't notice it before, but has a 
huge amount of magical power stored in it!"

"There is?" he asked in amazement.

"Yes, there is."  She then affected her best faked impression of 
shocked surprise, and dropped her voice to a stunned whisper.  "Oh... 
my... and with the incredible boost from its magical power, I have 
just detected that we are the victims of time warping magic!  While a 
few weeks have passed for us, only a few days have passed for the rest 
of the world!"

He looked genuinely shocked.  "So the pygmy village store WASN'T 
drastically behind the times as I thought it was!"  He looked 
seriously at her.  "Charity-chan, is there anything you can do?"

"Why yes, I shall try it right now!" she proclaimed dramatically.

"Let time and space restore,
 To that before the door,
 That led us into danger,
 That became stranger and stranger!"

There was a flash, some special effects that severely strained the 
effects budget, and time and space were returned to normality.

"Bravo, Charity-chan!" Villyn cheered, clapping.  "That was the best 
poetry I've heard in a long time!"

She blushed.  "You really think so?"

"Oh yes!"

She fought to control her deepening blush and tried to think.  "We 
really must be going.  I'm sure there will be people coming here 
soon."

"Too true.  It simply would not do for the future Evil Overlords of 
the world to be detained."  He paused, and looked around at the 
scenery.  It was fresh out of escape vehicles.  "But how shall we 
leave?"

"Let me handle that."

   *   *   *

Esjie's still-mysterious companion had returned from what he said had 
been an urgent appointment.  However, he'd returned too soon and heard 
Charity's spell.  Now he looked ill.

"Maeda, I thought your poetry was bad but that was even worse."

"Thanks.  I think. "

   *   *   *

Baron Stagner also looked ill.

"That is the worst poetry I've ever heard in my entire life.  And I 
have heard much bad poetry.  For I am the Lord of Darkness!  The 
Prince of Ill Will!  The Poet of all Bad Poets!  The Guy Your Mother 
Warned You About!  I... am Baron Stagner von Carrlson of the Kingdom 
of Obscurity!"

"Tell us something we don't know!" shouted his neighbours.

   - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = -

            C O M M E R C I A L   B R E A K

(A shot of the Do-Gooders on stage.  Tejina is bouncing around with 
lots of spunk, looking incredibly cute in her Sailor Delight costume;  
Kireiko is in his half oni state and looks ferocious and wild, but in 
a cool way;  Matsuro is drumming in a cool and detached bishounen 
manner;  and Becky is in her combination BA-3 trenchcoat and Sailor 
Delight fashion disaster fuku costume, playing the bass guitar.  
They're belting out their latest hit, "Drop Dead, Sis.")

Voice-over:  Presenting "Drop Dead, Sis", the latest album from 
Tokyo's incredible teen pop sensation, the Do-Gooders!  This album 
features such incredible hits as "Rape the Walrus", "Kill that child", 
and "Prosthetic Phallus Hat", the title track "Drop Dead, Sis", along 
with all new songs!

(A listing of all the songs on the album flies by, much too quick to 
read)

Voice-over:  Out now, at all disreputable music stores, and some 
reputable ones as well.

     E N D   O F   C O M M E R C I A L   B R E A K

   - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = -

The doorbell to the Villyn household wasn't like most doorbells.  
Instead of playing a simple chime, it was a spooky scream and several 
thuds that Villyn had recorded from an old horror movie.  However, he 
hadn't had the know-how to completely replace the chimes.  So when 
people pressed the doorbell button, a muzak version of "Bohemian 
Rhapsody" started playing, along with several terrifying screams, a 
few Godzilla roars, and the thud of giant footsteps.

Zathras wasn't used to it yet, and was cowering under a chair, 
mumbling things along the lines of "Scary noise, when it go away?  
Three times today, it already has been."

Normal kids, thought Aki bitterly as she headed down the hallway, 
don't grow up hoping nobody comes around to use the doorbell.

"I'LL GET IT!" shouted all five of her father's minions from various 
parts of the house, and the sound of running footsteps could be heard.  
There was the sound of a crash at the top of the stairs, and then a 
much louder crash from the bottom of the stairs, followed by lots of 
groaning and muttered swearing.

One minion had been downstairs and so he was still conscious - he was 
the as yet unnamed one, after the unsuitability of "The Deep Sea 
Swimmer" had been demonstrated.  He charged through the house towards 
the front door.  However, he had been too slow, and he entered the 
hallway just as Aki opened the door...

...and his master Nemesis Serendipity Villyn was revealed to be 
standing there with Queen Charity, both looking quite damp and 
bedraggled.  The minion fell to his knees and started kowtowing, 
interspersing banging his head on the floor with chants of "All hail 
Villyn-sama!"

Aki's response was much less adulative.  "Dad?" she asked 
incredulously.  "I thought you were going away for several weeks at 
least!  It's only been four days!"

"AKI!" he cried, and grabbed her in an all-encompassing hug.  "My dear 
Aki, it is a long and complicated story!  Involving nefarious magic 
that both I and Charity-chan were the victims of!  But we have broken 
the shackles of the magic that bound us and are now free to wreak 
vengeance and resume our plans to TAKE OVER THE WORLD!"

A passerby looked askance at the three in the entranceway, and then 
continued on, muttering something about Pinky and the Brain.

"Nefarious magic.  Right," said Aki, as she prised herself free from 
her father's almost-crushing embrace.  "Why's Queen Charity here?  
Doesn't she have the Darkverse to rule?"

"I'll be heading back there soon, Aki.  I just wanted to see how you 
were and have a look at the house."  She giggled.  "He says it has an 
incredible dungeon."

"But that's just the living room with stone effect wallpaper -" she 
started, but they weren't listening to her.  She sighed.

Villyn, escorting Charity through the house, passed the still 
kowtowing minion, and wondered aloud if the minion should be called 
The Devout Minion.

Zathras was still cowering under the chair, but was now saying things 
along the lines of "Evil Queen, what SHE doing here?"

Aki grumbled about parents, freeloaders, and annoying canaries that 
twittered on about the necessity of fukus, and stomped up to her room 
to go to bed.  It had been a long and trying day.

A short while later, after preparations that for the sake of decency 
shall only be mentioned in passing, she lay back in her bed and looked 
up at the darkened ceiling.  Well, mostly dark.  When she was younger 
she had pasted a lot of glow-in-the-dark stars onto the ceiling in the 
shape of various constellations, and had never bothered to take them 
down.  After several years they still glowed.

From the side of the room Charles hung upside down from his perch and, 
amazingly, snored.  His snores were quite loud for a small canary, but 
not annoyingly loud.  But she was used to it now and was able to tune 
it out to a mere background hum.

She was thinking.

She was quite definitely one of these Sailors.  She'd even had some 
disturbing dreams in the last couple of nights, when her inner Sailor 
Joy self had berated her for refusing to carry on a proud tradition 
and generally sounded like Dad.  As she'd had lots of practice 
ignoring her father's pleas for help in Conquering The World, she'd 
been able to ignore her other self's lectures so far.  But a lifetime 
of dreamtime rants on destiny and the cosmic significance of short 
skirts didn't sound very enjoyable.

The speed at which new Sailors were showing up was amazing, she 
thought drowsily.  There were four of them now, and how long ago had 
all this started?  She wasn't sure.

How many Sailors were out there, waiting to awaken?  According to 
Tejina's story, a generation of princesses from the Kingdom of Delight 
had been drawn together to make the Sailor Team.  How many princesses 
were being talked about, here?

Ayame had also said that the Sailors only started awakening when a 
danger was looming on the horizon.  There were at least four of them 
awakened already -  Well, almost all, Aki refused to transform into 
the fuku costume.  But she *knew* she was one of them.

But still, four of them already, in such a short time...

She fell asleep, and dreamed.

   *   *   *

Much later, in the dead of night, the bishounen astrologer 
Mohjojiujoovuuduwhodew stood outside the Villyn household and 
contemplated it.

So... this was where the daughter of the paramour of the Queen was 
located.  Now that the Queen and her paramour were back, if not quite 
yet in the Darkverse, his plan wasn't as important.  Also, the 
daughter was also known to be Sailor Joy.  Having one of the Sailor 
Team as an in-law of the Darkverse royal family would not look good.

But there was something else about her.  The story was she had used 
the Brackets of Power.  Vuudu wasn't quite sure what the significance 
of the Brackets of Power were, but apparently they were very 
significant and even the Queen had to obey them.

The Queen had also developed a liking for the girl and the girl had 
similarly developed one for the Queen.  With the two being on opposite 
sides, that shouldn't even be possible.

Clearly there was much more than met the eye going on here.

He easily let himself into the house - he was after all the Royal 
Astrologer and a youma general and so had a decent command of magic - 
and up to Aki's room, and looked at the sleeping girl, intrigued.  He 
could just as easily see she was dreaming.

Maybe he could have a look at her dreams.  Maybe they would lend a 
clue to the mystery of this girl.  It was an incredible breach of 
privacy, but Darkverse youmas usually didn't worry about such things.  
And it could be important.  After all, the Queen hadn't taken the 
throne back from Esjie yet.

So he concentrated and cast the magic and looked at her dreams.

   *   *   *

Around her, there was a battle going on.  Youma were everywhere, and 
the screams of the wounded and dying filled the air.  And all her 
friends - no, not just her friends, everybody she knew - were dead or 
dying.  There was Tejina, in the remains of her Sailor Delight 
costume.  There were Becky and Hanaki also in the remains of their 
Sailor outfits.

There was Kireiko, battling to the last.  There were Matsuro and 
Keiko, slumped together on the ground.  There were the dwarves.  There 
was Zathras, and the four animals, and Villyn's minions.  There was 
the Darkverse queen.

And lying beside Queen Charity there was her father;  his massive suit 
of armour hadn't been enough.  She hadn't noticed any pools of blood 
so far, but now she could clearly see the one her father was in.  It 
was visibly growing.

Aki Villyn stood amidst the carnage, her mouth an 'O' of horror, tears 
streaming from her eyes as she looked at her father's fallen form.

"No... nonono... this can't be happening... this is horrible... please 
let this just be a dream..."

In front of her someone appeared, her back turned to Aki.  No... it 
wasn't just 'someone'.  This was herself.  Or rather, herself as 
Sailor Joy, with the requisite small fuku.

"This *is* just a dream, Aki Villyn.  But this is also a memory of 
what has happened before.  This is also an indication of what may 
happen again."  There was a pause, and then Sailor Joy whirled on her, 
her face a mask of fury.  "Why do you resent me so much?  Why do you 
constantly refuse to allow me to awaken?  Is it *just* because of this 
costume?  The length of this skirt?  Or the bared stomach, perhaps?"

Aki couldn't reply.

"This I promise you, Aki Villyn.  If you do not accept me and who you 
are, what you see here shall seem pleasant in comparison.  Let me show 
you."

"No..." she protested weakly.

Her protests were in vain.  The scene around her froze, faded to 
black, and faded back into another battlefield.  Or rather, the 
remains of a battlefield after the battle had finished.

It stretched in every direction as far as she could see.  Dead bodies 
were everywhere, and with a start she realised there were more than 
soldiers lying amidst the ruins.  Women with rolling pins in their 
hands.  Children with terrified expressions etched on their faces.  
Her foot hit something that rolled away.  She looked down and saw that 
it was a baby's rattle.  She felt sick.

"This is what happened to the Kingdom of Delight of the Crystal 
Millenium when the Darkverse overran it.  Nobody was exempt from the 
slaughter."

"Please... stop showing me this..."

"If you wish."  The scene whirled and changed, but it was only to 
another part of the battlefield.

To be more specific, the part of the battlefield where the Sailor Team 
had died.  If she thought that the bodies she'd seen so far were 
horrifying, these were worse.  The fact that she thought she 
recognised Tejina, Becky, and Hanaki's faces amongst them made it even 
more horrifying.  She couldn't help herself - she keeled over and 
vomited, tears streaming from her eyes.

"If you do not accept me, if you do not become Sailor Joy and fight 
alongside the others, all this may happen again."

"Please..." she sobbed.  "This is too much..."

The scene thankfully faded to black.  All that was left was Sailor Joy 
glaring at her.  "Aki Villyn.  *You* are Sailor Joy.  Only *you* can 
do what Sailor Joy must do, nobody else can.  Remember that, otherwise 
the past will repeat."  With that, Joy folded her arms and looked at 
her.

"What do you want now?" asked Aki dully.

"I want *you* to realise you are Sailor Joy."

Aki realised she was holding the transformation brooch Charles had 
given her.  "You mean... you want me to transform?  Here?  NOW!?"

"Yes.  I want you to see it's not as bad or as embarassing as you 
think it is.  If I just left it at this, you might not do anything 
when you wake up.  You're good at that."

"NO!  STOP IT!"

"I will not stop this.  For you *must* become Sailor Joy.  There *is* 
a danger looming - it's big.  It's bigger than anything we've ever 
seen before.  And you now know what might happen if you don't accept 
me."

She flung the brooch at Joy.  "I can't!"

Joy caught the brooch, and then it disappeared;  with a start Aki 
realised it was back in her hand.  Joy's eyes bored into her.  "You 
*must.*  You *are* Sailor Joy."

The eyes stared into hers unflinchingly.  She wanted to blink, but 
somehow she couldn't.

Slowly she looked down at the brooch held in her hand.  There was a 
button on one side - it was the only moving part.  Obviously, all she 
had to do to transform was press the button.

Her finger rested on the button and trembled.  She didn't want to do 
this!

But... she *had* to.  Didn't she?

Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes, she pushed down and pressed 
the button.

Because her eyes were closed, she missed all the fancy visual effects 
that ensued, but she could feel her clothes shredding and being 
replaced by the costume, and the soul of Sailor Joy seemingly 
awakening inside her.

She opened her eyes in wonder, and she dimly heard a voice in her 
mind:

"Thank you."

   *   *   *

So, thought Vuudu.  Sailor Joy was now fully awakened.  This was 
interesting and perhaps even a little portentious of doom, but not 
terribly enlightening.

He stayed around for a little longer, but her dreams weren't all that 
helpful and it was becoming light outside.  She'd soon wake up and if 
he was caught loitering around in here then there would be trouble.  
Or at the very least annoyance.

This girl was definitely a mystery, and he'd like to work out what it 
was that connected her to the Queen.  He might try this again; he 
might not.  But for now there was no more time.  He quietly left the 
house and then and only then did he disappear in a burst of biorhythm 
charts.  After all, it wouldn't do to leave evidence of his presence 
lying around in her room.

   *   *   *

Kireiko was also dreaming.  His dreams were usually about fast women 
and sexy motorcycles, or possibly the other way around, or maybe both 
at the same time.  Whatever.  You get the idea.  However, his dreams 
this night were of a decidedly different nature.

For a start, he appeared in the middle of large forest.  Judging from 
the way the forest floor sloped, this was on a mountainside.  
Something seemed familiar about this.  Something important.

Then it clicked.  The first time he'd met his Oni father it had been 
in a dream in this very same forest.

"Guess the old man wants to talk to me again."

"Yeah, I do," came a distant voice on the breeze, "So hurry up and 
find the damn path to the shrine already."

The voice had seemed to come from behind him.  He turned and 
tinysweated as he saw a large well kept path just one meter away.

Once inside the shrine and exchanging the minimum of pleasantries, his 
Oni father cut to the point immediately.

"Son, there's all sorts of crap comin' and it doesn't look good."

"Yeah?"

"You betcha."  His father held up a hand and started counting off on 
his clawed fingers.  "One, there's power struggles going on over there 
in the Darkverse;  Two, there's vague noises of weirdness coming from 
the Kingdom of Obscurity -"

"The what?"

"Another of the many dimensions out there.  Anyway..." the oni looked 
confused, looked at his two fingers and continued.  "Three, you've got 
*two* new Sailors and each needs their holy artifacts as well -"

"Huh?"

"Y'know, Sailors Delight and Rapture have the Icon and Emblem.  I 
dunno how many Sailors there are but each has something similar.  Oh, 
and stop interrupting all the time, maintaining this through the ofuda 
on your window isn't easy.  Okay... where was I?"

"Fourth."

"Right. "  He resumed counting on his fingers.  "Fourth, there's also 
the Cthuluites;  Five, the Shub-Niggurath cults are starting to make 
dangerous noises;  Sixth, there are the Swords of Duality;  Seventh, 
the dragons are supposed to arise soon and *that* won't be pretty."  
The massive oni scratched his head, drawing blood.  Neither noticed.  
"I *think* that's everything, though there might be even more.  And 
Kireiko, the thing about all this is, it's all somehow related.  I 
dunno how, but it is."

"Just great," said Kireiko sarcastically.

"My sentiments exactly.  And, son, you're in the thick of it."

Before he could complain, the vision disappeared and his normal dreams 
resumed.  They weren't quite as exciting now, what with everything his 
oni father had just said.

   *   *   *

Aki woke up.  She wasn't surprised in the least to see that she was 
now wearing the Sailor Joy fuku out here in real life as well.

Despite the fact that she'd just overcome a major hurdle and finally 
worn the fuku, she realised she'd have to change back to her normal 
clothes to go to school.  Only, she didn't know how.

Her gaze rested on Charles, who was still asleep.  With a shout of 
"Wake up, birdbrain!" she threw the pillow at him.  With a surprised 
squawk, he awoke just in time to right himself in the air and glide to 
a landing.  He looked up, about to berate her, and his eyes bugged out 
as he saw she was now wearing the fuku of Sailor Joy.

"Incredible," he chirped.  "She finally changes and I'm asleep and 
miss it."

"Yes," she said shortly, "and that's all I'm telling you about it.  
Now, tell me how change back to normal.  I can't go to school in these 
clothes."

"Oh, is that all?  Just press the button on the brooch again."

"...oh."

She removed the brooch from her costume and pressed the button again, 
and with very little fanfare and effects the Sailor Joy costume was 
replaced by her pyjamas.

"May I ask why you finally chose to transform?"

"I told you before I wouldn't tell you anymore about it.  It's very 
personal, alright?"

"Ah, I think I understand," chirped the canary.

"Good," she said shortly.

   *   *   *

HOW MANY PEOPLE WERE EXPECTING *THAT* DREAM SCENE?  AND EVEN THOUGH 
AKI HAS FINALLY GIVEN IN AND WORN THE FUKU, ANOTHER, POSSIBLY EVEN 
MORE IMPORTANT QUESTION CAN BE ASKED - WHAT *DOES* SAILOR JOY'S 
COSTUME LOOK LIKE, ANYWAY?  WILL THE CTHULU OPERATIVES EVENTUALLY 
KIDNAP JODI FOSTER OR WILL THEY ACT TRUE TO FORM AND BUNGLE THAT, TOO?  
WHY DIDN'T SHUB-NIGGURATH MAKE AN APPEARANCE?  IF THE DO-GOODERS GET A 
GIG AT THE TOKYO TOWER WILL MATSURO REFUSE TO GO?  WOULD KEIKO?  WILL 
INTERMISSIONS AND COMMERCIAL BREAKS BECOME MORE COMMON?  AND WHY 
WASN'T THERE AN ATTEMPT AT THE LONGEST RUN-ON SENTENCE IN THIS 
CHAPTER?

...you know, I really have no idea.  But John, the next author, might 
know!  So tune in next week and see how many of these questions are 
answered!