It was a dark and stormy room. No, really, that's not a typo, it really WAS a dark and stormy room. Both literally and metaphorically - there was no light, the air was thick with evil and general nastiness, there were thunderclouds obscuring the half-ruined ceiling and it was so cold it was snowing, and there was an argument raging in the center of the room. Exactly what was being argued wasn't immediately clear, because the people doing the arguing were in a tent that was buried under half a metre of snow. The door slid open, revealing a dark shadowy figure. It stood there in the doorway for a moment, looking at the storm. It sighed and shrugged, opened an umbrella, and headed towards the mound of snow under which its compatriots argued. The figure walked past a series of wallscrolls, all of which proclaimed such things as the end of the world and all sorts of weird things about Dragons. Because of the constant threat of rain and snow, these wallscrolls had been placed in plastic sleeves before being hung on the walls, reducing the effect somewhat. The figure walked past a rack of swords and sword-like weapons, all of which had mostly illegible runes on the blades. However, if one was to look carefully at these runes, they would see a commonly recurring symbol that could perhaps be 'two', 'duality' or maybe even 'antique chicken coops', though the odds were against the last possibility. And despite the heavy snow and condensation, the blades were showing no signs of rusting for at least another millenium or three. The figure gingerly weaved its way past a few mystically glowing stones scattered on the floor, and finally reached the buried tent. When it arrived, it raised one hand and waved it mystically - there was a mystic and mysterious golden flare of power, and most of the snow sizzled and evaporated. The people inside looked up as the new arrival slipped inside. "Hi, Sakyou. Did you get a pizza without anchovies?" "Yes, Yoruko," said the figure recently named as Sakyou. "And before anybody asks, I DID get a Vegetarian, a Super Super Super Supreme, and a Carnivore's Carnivore Meat Lovers With Extra Barbeque sauce. I even got a Hawaiian with anchovies added for Hirata. So I don't want to hear anybody complain that I never get what they want." "Truly that is great foresight, Sakyou," said the one at one end of the tent. The casual observer would have easily and correctly picked this one as the leader before getting quickly and messily killed for trespassing. "Now let us divert our attention from what the ever helpful Sakyou has brought us for lunch, and from the need for good carpentry. It is time we talked of the Dragons." "Ah," said one. "The Dragons," said another. "The Earth Dragon in particular?" asked the lady named as Yoruko. "Yes indeed," said the leader. "The prophesised time of the Dragons' Awakening is drawing close, Harbringers. The Earth Dragon must defeat all others. Only then can the future we wish come to pass." "I thought there were only two Dragons," said Yoruko. "As did I, but the prophecies are unclear on that point. There could be two, there could be many. What is definitely clear is that all of us Harbringers need to be gathered together for the Earth Dragon to Awaken, but we are still missing several members. Including the One. Hence my latest plan." "Which is?" There was an unpleasant wheezing noise, which upon closer inspeaction turned out to be the leader laughing. "It is in operation now..." ------------------------------------------------------ Do Gooders (The Proactive Teen Superhero Team With No X Anywhere In Their Title) A FanArt HQ / Spoof Chase Improfanfic Episode 29: New Arrivals! And the new beginning gets under way! Written by Steven Scougall Original Do-Gooders concept by Stefan Gagne, 1998 ------------------------------------------------------ Tejina, Becky, and Hanaki stared at the robots that were suddenly swarming throughout the mall, wreaking havoc and leaving chaos in their wake. They stared in particular at the robot standing in the middle of their lunch, but it wasn't doing anything threatening. Yet. All it was doing was swinging its head from girl to girl, lights on its head flashing red, green, and orange. They backed away warily. Becky, fully in Agent BA-3 mode, reached for a gun; Tejina reached for her transformation pen; and Hanaki wished that she hadn't left Pepper at home. The robot fixed its gaze on Tejina and the lights of its eyes flickered in a new and disturbing pattern. Because it's necessary for robots to issue a running commentary of exactly what they're doing, even if it's logically unnecessary, a mechanical voice issued from a speaking grille, saying "Found one that matches given pattern." "Huh?" said Tejina. "Pattern?" In answer, it started walking towards her. It would have been a lot more menacing if its short legs didn't force it to move in an utterly ridiculous waddle. Before it could go very far, Becky shot it. The thing was shoved a very short distance to the side, and a sizeable dent appeared in its armoured body, but it was otherwise unharmed. It reoriented to face her. "Threat detected. Neutralising threat." Becky could tell when danger was imminent, and dove to the side just as a hail of bullets spat from one of the robot's arms. She landed and rolled over behind the pot of a large plastic plant. Tejina took advantage of the distraction to click her transformation pen, and once the expensive special effects of the transformation sequence had ended she hit the robot with a Cardo Suwaru. Hanaki had long ago ducked down behind a potted plant - the same one Becky was behind, by an amazing coincidence. "I have GOT to start taking Pepper with me more," moaned Hanaki. "I hate being stuck as the damsel in distress." "I'm sure a solution to our predicament shall present itself shortly," said Becky. "Until then take cover and be careful, Miss Shirokaze." "Even a communicator of some sort, so that I could call Pepper when I need him," complained Hanaki. Its armoured body now covered with lots of dents, the robot turned to face the source of the swarm of magically enhanced cut up credit cards. Its 'eyes' flickered as it saw Sailor Delight. "Girl matching pattern has changed appearance and power levels. Recalibrating." In response Sailor Delight hit it with a Cheku Bounce, and the robot bounced off the floor, the ceiling, a couple of the walls, the floor again, and finally went through a shop window. It got up, still going, its armour now one massive dent, with steam billowing out from several ruptures. It tried to take a step but wavered drunkenly. "Power... sccrk... levelsh higher ...fzzt... than appeared. Recal... recal... reconstituting..." "What does it take to STOP one of these things?" "Just a bit more, Tej!" shouted Hanaki. "That'll put it down for good!" Sailor Delight sighed, walked forward and pushed the swaying robot over. With a mechanical sigh and final spray of sparks, the robot ceased movement and 'died'. But by now about twenty other robots had noticed the fight and were waddling over. Sailor Delight looked at them for a moment with dread. "Help! Becky, Sis, help me out here!" Becky bit her lip. Truth be told, she hadn't expected to be attacked by virtually indestructible robots sent by the Mad Scientist's League of Japan, and had only packed the Glock, which had already proved to be less than adequate. The Sailor Rapture part of her brain started yelling at her to transform, but the Agent BA-3 part calmly and logically pointed out that Tejina's efforts were proving not much more effective than the gun had been. Inside Becky's head, Sailor Rapture yelled "But she IS having some effect! So transform!" Agent BA-3 responded with "It'd be pointless!" "I said CHANGE!" "And *I* said it'd be pointless! Look out there! We need to work out some other plan!" "CHANGE!" "IT WOULDN'T WORK!" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH" screamed Becky, clutching at her head. "Becky?" said Hanaki, waving a hand in front of her friend's eyes. "Hey! Snap out of it! Tej is in trouble!" Back at the fight, the robots were closing in. Sailor Delight was firing off Cardo Suwaru and Cheku Bounce attacks like there was no tomorrow, but it was hardly enough for the huge number of robots closing in. She bit her lip. Time for the most powerful attack she knew. Her hands started making the gestures and she mumbled the words under her breath, keeping a wary eye on the advancing horde. They were getting *very* close... And then it was ready. "DELIGHTFUL ACCOUNT OVERDRAFT!" she yelled, wondering how an attack that drained mainly shopping energy would work on things that weren't natural shoppers. Amazingly, it worked. After a fashion. The blast of magical energies plowed into the robots, and after a moment robots started staggering, and some even fell over. But after a moment of disorientation, most continued advancing on her. She raced through the motions, backing away nervously, and fired off another Delightful Account Overdraft. A few robots stayed down; most of them kept coming. If a bit sluggishly. She tried to back away but had run out of backing room. "HELP!" she shouted, her back quite literally to the wall, or window in this case. Hanaki looked from the helpless Sailor Delight to the unmoving and whimpering Becky, and realised that they were stuck. "This sucks," she grumbled. "I HAVE to start taking Pepper with me everywhere I go... If I get out of this..." "Fear me, evil mechanial creations, and fear my wrath! For you have interrupted the fun shopping trip I was having with my newfound sisters and their friend Rebecca Petulia Anderson, which was providing me with many insights into their characters and my own, and in particular you interrupted me as I was gazing at a peculiarly coloured dress that was sparking a certain reaction, or possibly a memory, within me that might have been extremely important and would perhaps provide a clue into the apparently bizarre situation I am in, and not only that your attack ruined the dress so I shall never have its visual cue again, and thus angered I shall punish you with my special technique that draws upon my powers as the Sailor of Exposition, the INCREDIBLY LONG SENTENCE OF SLEEP-INDUCING EXPOSITION!" There was an incredibly bright flash of white light, and after the blue and purple spots went away, and the author stopped congratulating himself on writing a 128 word long sentence, Hanaki, Becky, and Sailor Delight could see that many of the robots around them were on what passed as their backs, with metallic snores emanating from their speaker grilles. Standing in the middle of the passed out robots was Sailor Exposition, her arms over her chest in a vengeful pose of Righteous Anger. She held the pose for a second or two, then broke out into a big grin, flashing a victory sign. "Yes! It actually worked!" She hurried over to the group. "Hey, Tej, Han, Beck, are you guys alright?" "..." was all Sailor Delight had to say. "I thought that window Sis was backed up to was going to get broken for sure," said Hanaki. * * * For Nemesis Serendipity Villyn, life was looking up. His minions had proved amazingly useful and incredibly loyal time and time again. Queen Charity would be coming for dinner, and Villyn had just hatched a brilliant new plan for overtaking the world with moon beams and wanted to share it with her. Aki was out with her friends, so there was no risk of her hearing him rant about his plans. His mind conveniently glossed over the fact he had ranted about the plan for about ten minutes to one of her friends who had called in. Best of all, he'd just recived a telephone call saying he no longer had those annoying group sessions to go to. He basked in the happy glow of someone who has seen Hell and survived. "News just in!" shouted the TV announcer. "A gigantic horde of killer robots is swarming all over Tokyo, attacking and pillaging indiscriminately!" "WHAT?" shouted Villyn, leaping to his feet, his armour clanking. The TV report changed to a helicopter shot of Tokyo. The rotund white forms of the robots were everywhere. All around them were the forms of fleeing civilians. "There are pockets of resistance," continued the anchorman, and the TV switched to shots of Sailors Delight and Exposition fighting back against the robots, and then to such shots as martial artists kicking robots into the stratosphere; a darkskinned woman firing shots right into the robots' cameras, blinding them; and small darkskinned men poking at robots with pointed sticks and amazingly doing damage. The program switched back to the hysterical announcer. "But for the most part citizens are fleeing for their lives!" "By gods, Aki's out there! She's in danger!" shouted Villyn. "Aki-sama has the Camper, though," said Thrakkorzog? Thurston Dunne? Tharz - whatever his name was. Villyn jumped, he hadn't heard the four minions come into the room. "I'm sure she'll be alright." "Yes, with just one of us protecting her she has nothing to fear!" shouted the Blank Psychic, and then started cackling maniacally. "The Quake Camper?" Villyn paused for a moment. What was it about the Camper... Oh yes, that was it. "But he needs a steady supply of rockets! And I doubt he does! Quick! We must find them!" "Oh great Villyn-sama, but where is she supposed to be?" "I have no idea, but probably in this area! Unnamed Minion, you come with me, you others, split up! Now quick, we must get out there and look for her!" * * * Matsuro was not having a good day. In the first place, the night before had been filled with disturbing dreams, all of them about the choice between Aki and Keiko. The assault hadn't let up after he woke up; the visions were coming much more often today, and their common theme had been the choice between the two girls. He had planned to do a lot of outstanding homework today, but that had been very difficult when the words on the pages kept on reforming themselves to "You must choose between the Light and Dark". In a fit of boredom and annoyance, he had decided to go on a walk and try to think clearly about things, but little green frogs kept on flying around his head singing something about rainbows. And on top of all that, a huge number of robots had just dropped out of the sky and were laying waste and ruin to everything around him. At first he'd thought it was another vision, if a slightly less than imaginative one, but when people started running and screaming, he decided that it must have been real. So he drew his sword from his stomach and started fighting the robots. Some of them twittered at him about matching patterns, but he sliced their heads off anyway. The day went from bad to worse when Keiko and Aki showed up almost simultaneously from opposite directions, followed shortly by the Quake Camper. Of course, they were all busy fighting for their lives, but once that finished he just knew there would be trouble. * * * Just a quarter of an hour earlier... The people in the stands were on their seats, roaring their approval. The up-and-coming young star was racing across the field, football clutched to his chest, easily evading the desperate tackles of the opposing team. The yards fell away under his pounding feet. Only thirty more metres to go... He went into a crouch and a member of the opposition flew over his head and crashed into another member of the opposing team. Twenty... Ten... He lifted the football up above his head, an idea for a basketball like 'slam dunk' touchdown over the goalposts popping into his head. People would be talking about this touchdown for years to come... ...or so Kireiko hoped. In actuality, this was just American Football practice, and the crowds were bored parents, and the opposing team was actually half his own team, but he didn't let such minor details get in the way of his vision. He prepared to jump... And then about two hundred robots dropped in, one right in front of him, and he tripped over it. Kireiko saw red. Then the robot saw red, when Kireiko ripped off his shirt and changed into his half-oni form. Ten seconds later the robot was in pieces all over the field and was in no condition to be seeing anything. Kireiko leapt at a small clutch of robots and tackled to them to the ground, picked up one of the stricken machines, and broke it in two over his knee. He then went on a general rampage, yelling such things as "Interfering oafs!" and "Ruin my touchdown, willya?", sometimes in English. "Look at him go," said the assistant coach in admiration. There was a long drawn out mechanical crashing noise, and the assistant coach clapped enthusiastically. "That's the best tackle I've seen from him yet. Maybe we should change his field position, make him more forward or something." "However," said the main coach, adjusting his glasses, "the opposing team would rather look down on having their team members ripped limb from limb. And I'm sure there's something in the rules about changing to half-oni forms. The boy stays where he is." The assistant coach sighed. * * * "...and so that's the plan," finished the leader. "This is ridiculous!" shouted one of the yet unnamed members of the meeting. "Why should we stoop to working with such incompetents?" "Since the fact that there are only five of us. This way we get blanket coverage of the city." "That might be true," said Sakyou, "but I still don't like it. Can we trust them?" "As far as I could throw them." "We know you could throw them, their building, and all their inventions halfway around the world," said Sakyou. "Oh all RIGHT, I'll use another expression. As far as I could spit." The others thought about this for a moment. "Better," said the other as yet unnamed member of the meeting. "You can't spit very far." They lapsed into silence. "You have to admit," said Yoruko doubtfully, "that this way we'll find them much quicker than we would have if we just tried looking ourselves..." They lapsed into another silence. For about five seconds, and then Sakyou's mobile phone rang. "Excuse me a moment," he said, and held the phone up to his ear. "Sakyou Sagare here. Look, this is a very bad time, and - oh, sorry." He held the phone out to the leader. "It's for you." The leader took the phone. "Yes? Oh, hello Doctor... Found? FOUR? Already? Where are they? ... What do you mean not operating?" The leader listened for a while. "Alright, alright, you can stop speaking technobabble - " the leader held the phone away for a moment " - just give me the details... Okay, thanks, Doctor. Yes, yes, good luck with taking over Japan." The leader handed the phone back to Sakyou. "Unsubtle as it may have been, working with the Mad Scientists has found us two of our missing number already, and two possibles, in two groups. I've got as much detail on the them as they could get. Yoruko, you will go after one group and Sakyou, you will go after the other." "But," asked Yoruko, "what are we supposed to do when we find them?" "They are destined Harbringers. They will have no choice but to join us." The leader paused. "Though... one of them might be the prophesised One. If so, you will have to bring him to -" Yoruko 'ahem'ed politely yet pointedly. "Or her, yes, it might be one of the girls, to our point of view. Now, you two, go. Don't forget your swords on the way out, and stay away from the mystic stone mines." * * * Sailor Exposition had sent the twenty robots attacking Sailor Delight to sleep, but there were at least three hundred others rampaging throughout the mall. She had got the bright idea of using the PA system to use an Incredibly Long Sentence of Sleep-Inducing Exposition on every single robot in the mall. Unfortunately, after they'd battled their way to it, they discovered it was wrecked. So now they just fought the robots as they came across them. Becky was still in Agent BA-3 mode, firing halfheartedly at the robots. In Becky's head the voice of Sailor Rapture was yelling at her insistently, saying she could fight the robots much better than BA-3 could. She finally gave in, and gave the mental command that triggered the transformation. Her first action as Sailor Rapture was to Form her Blazing Sword and slice the head off a robot that had come too close during the transformation sequence. The body sputtered to a stop. She then started using Evangelist Confusions to confuse robots en masse. Along with Sailor Exposition's Incredibly Long Sentences of Sleep-Inducing Exposition, they were slowly starting to turn the tide. In the panicked confusion of battle, they didn't know the woman was coming until she was only a step away from the four. "Hi," said the woman. Spinning around and going "AAAH!" was the general reaction. She looked VERY dark. It wasn't the black hair or the black eyes or the black eyeshadow or the black clothes. It seemed to be a basic darkness that permeated her entire being, and somehow it managed to overcome her unusually pale skin. They stared. "Staring like that is quite rude you know," said the woman. She extended a hand, and a sword with really cool yet illegible runes slid out from her palm. She then casually thrust the sword through the gap between the Sailors Rapture and Exposition and skewered a robot's neck. "I do believe you're supposed to be fighting these things, not standing around gaping." That galvanised the four - well, three, Hanaki couldn't do much except for 'damsel in distress' impressions - back into action. Rapture threw up a Revolutionary Shell with as much power as she could, just in time for several charging robots to smash into. * * * While slicing the fiftieth robot to bits, Matsuro wondered if there was any end to these things. He, Keiko, and Aki had been fighting against them for a good twenty minutes now and there seemed to be no end to them. But then again, they were remarkably stupid and didn't seem to grasp the necessity of getting out of the way of his flashing sword. His arm was getting tired, though. The two girls looked as if they also were starting to get worn out. It must have been the energy loss of all those magic attacks they were throwing around. With growing horror, he realised there might not *be* an afterwards for them to have an argument about. At least those annoying green frogs had gone away, and he could see what he was doing properly. He saw Sailor Joy stumble in that ridiculously large Princess Anniki dress, and a robot waddled at high speed at her, a claw upraised. He quickly slashed through the robot he was fighting and ran to her aid, but with a growing feeling of dread he knew he'd be too late... "Joyful Cleansing Light," she mumbled, and a small spurt of white light came from her hands, burning a hole about a centimetre deep into the robot's armour. Which definitely wasn't enough. The robot's claws slashed down at her. There was a blur and bright flash, and then there was a young man, even more of a bishounen than Matsuro was, holding Aki in one arm and smiling disarmingly at her. In his other hand was a sword with runes very similar to the ones on Matsuro's sword. Behind the new arrival, the robot fell into twenty pieces. "Yo," smiled the man, and then noticed Keiko, or to be more specific, her cleaver/sword hybrid. "What the HELL?" "What?" she asked, slicing through another robot. He looked at her oddly. "Neither a Harbringer nor a Seal?" "A what or a what?" "And that sword of yours..." He blinked, and then his sword suddenly stabbed over her head into a robot jumping her, and it died in a shower of sparks. "I can explain later," he said. "Right now we have these things to deal with." "DUCK!" squeaked the Quake Camper, and they dropped just in time for a rocket to swish over their heads and destroy a small group of robots that had been sneaking up on them. * * * In a nice house in a nice reputable area of Kyoto, Mariko was annoyed. Really really annoyed. Those IDIOT girls Yaki and Yumeki hadn't bothered thinking about how to get to Tokyo at all... If they weren't her teammates and her best friends, inasmuch a thoroughly evil girl could have friends, she would have killed them in exasperation. She was so annoyed that she felt like finding someone else and killing him or her several times over. She sat around the house and stewed in her thorough exasperation, idly flicking through a blood and guts splatterfest manga, but it was nothing compared to what her imagination could think up. Muttering imprecations against all stupid teammates, she threw the manga aside and flicked on the TV and started channelsurfing. "...I've dedicated my life to the creation of the..." "Stupid ad," she mumbled and changed the channel. "...let's all play with Babi, don't you think it'll be fun?" "Another stupid ad," she mumbled and changed channels again. "...now observe the cormorant getting horribly killed by the mighty hawk..." Mariko watched the grisly death of the cormorant in fascination, but when the documentary started twittering on about the nesting habits of hawks she grew bored and changed the channel once more. "...love you, you love me, we're..." She changed the channel so fast her finger broke the sound barrier. "...reporting on the robot invasion crisis in Tokyo!" Mariko blinked. Another invasion crisis in Tokyo? So soon after the monster one of only a few days ago? She sat up in interest and watched the news report. "The roads are packed with the worst traffic jam in recent memory. Citizens are starting to abandon their cars and run over the top of them in order to get away from the robots. While there are pockets of resistance, these are thinning out as the citizens give up against the sheer number of the killer robots." The TV started switching between shots of people fighting back. Mariko sat bolt upright. The shot had lasted only half a second, but just for a moment there had been a couple of groups of sailor fuku'ed girls attacking the ridiculous looking machines of death. But it wasn't them in particular, it had been just one of them... ...her fuku had been completely black, and she was firing a blast of pure darkness... There was something about the girl that struck her to the core. This girl was important, somehow. Not caring that she had a highly prized tape of an extremely disturbing and illegal splatterfest and S&M movie in the VCR, she hit Record, hoping that they'd come back to the shot of the black-fuku'ed girl. They did, eventually, but not before the classic opening scene had been entirely overwritten. Yet, she was so interested in this girl that she didn't care. She'd have to show this to Kahi, see what he made of it... * * * The fight had carried them from where they had started to a couple of streets away from the main shopping district. The place was mostly deserted, and the only people around seemed to be their five. Oh, and lots of the invading robots, but that went without question. There was the sound of Sakyou's mobile phone ringing. While continuing to fight with one hand, he flipped out the mobile and spoke into it. "Sakyou Sagare here, this is a really bad time - oh, hi Hirata... Yes, I did..." Sakyou glanced out of the corner of his eye at the listening Matsuro. "Actually, I'll talk to you about such things later." He ducked a hail of bullets and flawlessly sliced the legs, arms and head off another robot in one movement. "And yes, I AM still fighting off these damn robots. Come up with another plan next time... Yoruko's nearby?" There was a bright flash off in the distance. "I think I just saw them off in the distance... Meet up with them? Okay, then, bye, talk to you later. See if you can't do something about these things, okay?" He pressed the Off button with his thumb and put the phone back in his pocket, then easily dodged aside and sliced yet another robot in half. "We have a plan, folks, head towards where that bright flash came from. There should be a colleague of mine there." * * * The killer robots were everywhere, but they were no match for Villyn's physical strength and his technoarmour. He ran through the streets, searching desperately for Aki. The fact that she was a reincarnation of a Crystal Kingdom Princess and apparently had power beyond compare didn't even get considered. All that mattered was that she was his daughter, and she was out here amidst this riot. He had to find and save her... His armoured feet thudded into the pavement, striking sparks. And then suddenly there were voices jabbering at him from the side. "A'ilim b'po!k Veeleen t'kas!xckr'ick!" "Veeleen'ick! K'l'ia!" He paused. That sounded exactly like those pygmies he and Charity had come across on that cruise, didn't it? He turned to face where the voices had come from. And saw that yes indeed, it was two of the pygmy tribe he'd come across, waving their spears in their oh so quaint greeting customs. His face broke out into a wide smile. They liked him so much they'd come to find him! What loyalty! What dedication! Now, how could he best use this to his advantage? They continued speaking and waving their spears and advancing upon him. "Greetings!" he boomed. "I am impressed by your devotion and loyalty to me! And right now I require your help in finding my daughter Aki!" They looked confused. He mentally chastised himself, remembering that only a few of them could understand Japanese. The Unnamed Minion finally caught up with him, and surveying the scene instantly charged at the two pygmies with a way cry. "Unnamed Minion, stop! These are my friends!" The Unnamed Minion instantly stopped charging and turned to kowtow towards him. "I am very sorry O Great Villyn-sama!" The two pygmies continued to jabber in their Pacific Island language, which was an almost incomprehensible mess of consonants and guttural clicks. The Unnamed Minion scowled and turned upon the two. "Veeleen'ick b'po!k j'n!" The pygmies stared, then started jabbering questions at the Unnamed Minion like there was no tomorrow, and he started responding. Villyn stared. "Unnamed Minion! You can understand these two?" "Yes, O Great Villyn-sama! I knew that taking that Pacific Islander Languages course would be useful someday!" "So talk to these two and tell them to help me find Aki!" The three continued talking to each other. Villyn stood aside and watched them with interest. * * * It took only a few minutes for the two groups to meet up at a spot just outside the shopping mall. The first thing Matsuro noticed about the other group was another girl in a sailor fuku, in a lighter yellow than Sailor Rapture's fashion disaster fuku. "Another one?" He then noticed the green hair and similarity of facial features. "Ayame-san?" "Matsuro," said Sailor Delight, "this is Sailor Exposition, and this is Yoruko." "Hi," he said in his best disinterested bishounen manner. Sakyou noticed the sparkly effects in Yoruko's eyes and groaned. She'd be talking about this Matsuro for weeks. "We're still under attack, you know," he said. "I'd advise that we leave lengthy introductions until after this is over." And then, with incredibly ironic timing, the robots stopped their relentless advance. "Okay, perhaps not," said Sakyou. In fact, the robots had stopped ALL movement. All at the SAME time. Hanaki poked at one in curiosity and it fell over with a humourous CLANG but otherwise did nothing. "Weird," she said. "It looks like their attack is over, anyway." * * * Kahi peered at the TV screen with interest. In most other households a brightly coloured lizard watching TV would cause some comment, but Mariko's parents had long ago given up on their daughter and her erratic behaviour. The video had been paused, there was a bright white line at the top of the screen, and the whole picture was juddering slightly. On screen there was a shot of the black-fuku'ed girl. Details were impossible to make out, but Kahi could see enough. "Interessting," he hissed. "I believe that girl iss none other than Ssailor Darknesss." "Sailor DARKNESS?" asked the three girls. "Aye, sso sshe iss. And before you assk "Who'ss she?" let me tell you. Sshe iss the Dark to Mariko'ss Light and in the Darkversse sshe wass a key part of your little band of Ssailorss." "Kahi, why didn't you tell us about her before?" asked Mariko petulantly. Yaki and Yumeki exchanged a Look. If anyone else withheld important information from Mariko they'd end up on the floor begging to tell her what it was. Oh, and to be killed too. "I thought that thiss time sshe had not arissen." "I see." Yaki spoke up. "This gives us yet another reason to go to Tokyo, I guess." "You wissh to meet her?" The lizard laughed - it was an extremely disturbing sound. "Little chancse, that girl in the dresss appeared to be a Princesss of the Crysstal Kingdom. If Darknesss iss working with her then sshe will not work with you." Mariko's smile seemed perfectly normal, yet Yaki and Yumeki started edging away, eyeing the nearby sofa, and judging how quickly they could get behind it. "I guess," she purred, "we'll just have to... 'persuade' her then." * * * B'pko was stunned. "You can speak our language?" V'k'hu!cx was much more enthusiastic. "Finally! Someone who can understand us!" "Though there was that person at that restaurant." "Well, apart from him, this is the only other one we've encountered who can understand us!" The Unnamed Minion interjected. "It doesn't matter! Villyn-sama's daughter is lost amidst the chaos of this robot invasion and he requests that you help us find her." He didn't say it quite like that, of course. "Daughter" had to be replaced with the word meaning "only daughter that is between the ages of fifteen and eighteen", and he had to use "man-not-of-the-holy-iguana's-mud" instead of "robot". However, such trans-language complications are called complications for they are indeed very complicated, and so will be henceforth be ignored. "Hmph," hmphed B'pko. "First he steals the Holy Artifact of the Morning and then he wants us to help find his daughter. We should be kidnapping her and ransoming her for the Artifact instead." The Unnamed Minion's voice was dangerous. "You accuse the Great Villyn-sama of stealing?" "Oh no," said V'k'hu!cx. "We saw him nick off with it with our very eyes. We KNOW he did it." "The Great Villyn-sama would not steal your Holy Artifact!" the Unnamed Minion said hotly. "He would ask for it!" In response B'pko rummaged around inside the pouch hanging from his belt and produced a series of polaroids showing Queen Charity swiping the Artifact from the statue. "Does THIS look the actions of someone who asked for the Holy Artifact?" asked B'pko. "You have cameras?" "Just because we're a little pygmy tribe in the middle of nowhere means we have to be technologically backwards, you know." * * * Kireiko got up from yet another power tackle and flexed his biceps. "Alright, 'who wants some?'" he growled. "Come on, don't be shy!" The rest of the team roared their approval from the sidelines, but the robots steadfastly stood still. "What, are you are all too wussy? Too scared?" Kireiko laughed. The coach looked worried. "Now he's insulting mere machines..." "Well, they were trying to kill him," said the assistant coach. They looked over at the field. The field that had mechanical scrap and many MANY pieces of robots strewn all over. The extremely torn up and halfway ruined field that would take days to fix. "Could we bill the boy's family for damages?" "Don't even think about it, they're accountants and know the Nakaos." The assistant coach paled. "The lawyers?" The coach nodded. "The very same. We'll just have to try and get some money from elsewhere to try and fix this field." The two coaches sighed in resignation. * * * Villyn was stunned. "You mean they're out to kill me because the Artifact of the Morning was not actually a parting present but was stolen by Charity-chan?" "That is what they claim, Villyn-sama!" "Bah," he bahed. "That simply can not be correct. Charity-chan would not lie to me about such matters." The three started arguing amongst themselves again, and after a few minutes The Unnamed Minion turned back to him again. "They say that when you left there was much spear waving and war cries, and wonder how you could misconstrue such events. They said they even sent you a message requesting the Artifact back, and yet all you did was continue on." "But," he protested weakly, "Charity-chan wouldn't lie to me about something like that..." They talked a bit more, the pygmies' voices expressing surprise and amused disdain. The Unnamed Minion turned back to him. "That is exactly what V'k'hu!cx and B'pko suggest, Villyn-sama." "This does indeed give me much to think about," said Villyn. "But even if she did steal the Artifact, no doubt Charity-chan had good reasons to do so. I shall have to talk with her when she comes over tonight." The pygmies asked a question, and the three talked for about a minute. Their conversation then got very heated, with the pygmies screeching in rage. The Unnamed Minion turned to face Villyn. "Er... B'pko and V'k'hu!cx requested if they could see both you and Queen Vengeance, and discuss with you about getting the Artifact back." "But it was destroyed only yesterday in the fight against those Void thingies." "I told them so. That's when they became very angry, Villyn-sama. That Artifact was their most holiest of items, and they are very upset that it was destroyed." * * * The ten stood amidst the wreckage of destroyed robots. Now that the battle was over, people started returning to their normal guises. The Sailors detransformed amidst many special effects. Matsuro put his sword back in his stomach. The Quake Camper's rocket launcher disappeared to somewhere in his giant pack. Hanaki didn't have to detransform so just stood there. The eight looked over at Sakyou and Yoruko. The two shrugged, and 'sheathed' their swords - Yoruko's went into her palm and Sakyou's went into his side. But apart from that initial openness, the conversation, such as it was, contained lots of pauses and embarassed silences. There wasn't much explanation or exposition at all. Something, thought Tejina, that had to be fixed. She wanted to know about these two and why they had swords that were so similar to Matsuro's. "Alright," she started, "now that the robot attack appears to be over, can we please get some explanations?" "Of what?" asked Yoruko. "Just who ARE you two? I mean, your swords have markings very similar to those on Matsuro's and Keiko's. And Yoruko's came out from her palm and Sakyou's comes from his side, just like Matsuro's comes from his stomach. It's all too similar to be just a coincidence." "And you said something about Harbringers and Seals," said Keiko. "What was all that about?" The two ahemed and aahed and looked embarassed. So... it seemed that they'd said a bit too much. "It seems you've said and done a bit too much," said Becky. They looked embarassed some more. "Stop looking embarassed and start explaining! There's been too much confusion already!" yelled Aki. "I can make them exposit," said Ayame. "It's one of my tricks as Sailor Exposition." Now they looked nervous. "No need to get hasty," said the young man introduced as Sakyou, holding up a hand in a conciliatory fashion. "We'd have to explain anyway." "We would?" asked the young woman introduced as Yoruko. "Well of COURSE we would," retorted Sakyou, "what ELSE are we supposed to do?" "But there are OTHERS here." "They look to be friends, they'll probably end up hearing about it anyway." He turned to Matsuro. "You're a destined Harbringer." "A what?" "You've had apocalyptic visions, I presume. You recieved that sword from someone you know who's died in your dreams. Am I right?" "Yeah," he said in his best bishounen way. "I keep on having weird visions, too." "Still? Weird. Anyway -" "But what's a Har-" "In a minute." He addressed Tejina. "You too are also a Harbringer, though not quite as advanced as your friend Matsuro." "What about me?" asked Keiko. "You have the right sort of sword, but your pattern doesn't quite match that of a Harbringer. You who had the tattoos on your face, too." "Say what?" asked Becky. "That blazing sword of yours. It *seems* to be a Sword of Duality but it's hard to be sure. And like your black clothed friend here your pattern doesn't quite match that of a Harbringer. Now there are some rivals of ours out there called Seals, but your patterns don't quite match those of the Seals either." "In other words," said Yoruko, "you seem to be wildcards, which is unheard of." Sailor Delight was feeling very confused. "But you haven't yet said what a Harbringer or a Seal really is yet," she protested. Sakyou and Yoruko looked nervous. "We really shouldn't say in front of those who are neither..." mumbled Yoruko. "[Tell] us [RIGHT] [NOW] what the Harbringers and Seals are," said Sailor Joy. Sakyou blinked, then spoke. "Those who will bring the Dragons and the end of the world." - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - C O M M E R C I A L B R E A K (The commcercial opens with some powerful rock anti-hero music and a shot of two young boys, one wearing a huge pack and wielding a plastic rocket launcher, and the other wearing a fencing mask. Each is holding several action figures of the Villyn minions.) Voiceover: The Villyn minions! (The QUAKE CAMPER BOY lifts the rocket launcher and makes a "BOOM!" noise, completely forgetting to emulate the kickback. A BADLY MADE-UP YOUMA jumps on screen, attacks the BLACNK PSYCHIC BOY, and promptly falls over while the BP-BOY cackles maniacally.) (Shots of each action figure are shown in rapid succession, the Voice- Over synchronised with each shot:) Voiceover: The Blank Psychic! The Quake Camper! The Unnamed Minion! The Bluefaced Black Shadow! And Thrakkorzog? Thurston Dunne? Tharz - whatever his name is, the Reality Warping Boy! (Switch to a shot showing of all five action figures together, each facing out in a menacing pose. In the background are the QC-BOY and the BP-BOY continuing to roleplay with more BMU-YOUMAs.) Voiceover: The Villyn Minions! Collect all five! Different, much quicker voiceover: Action figures sold separately at 1000 yen each and available at all good toy stores. Cosplay material not included. E N D O F C O M M E R C I A L B R E A K - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - = - On the surface of the water there was the scene of the ten standing amidst robot wreckage in the middle of the street. The Baron looked away from his glass of water and groaned. Not ANOTHER apocalyptic threat. They'd fought off one just yesterday. "'nother 'poca... 'pocala... 'nd 'f th' worl' threat?" slurred Lessente. "But... butbutbut... um..." The Baron sighed in irritation. Ever since the man's drinking binge in the past couple of days, it was as if he'd found a new hobby. He waved a hand and the man was shocked into sobriety. "Thanks," said Lessente. "I still can't hold whiskey. Anyway, as I was going to say, we fought an apocalyptic threat off just yesterday." "Thank you, Lessente, for that utterly pointless observation." "Pointless?" "I knew it already, remember." "Ah, of course. But I just had to say something." The Baron dispelled the scrying spell and the scene disappeared from the surface of the water, and the glass of water went back to being a normal glass of water. He then turned to face his informant. "In any case, tell me what you came here to say, Lessente. Try to tell me something I don't know." The Darkverse High General looked confused for a moment, and then remembered what he came here for. "The Queen is going to be at Villyn's tonight." The Baron waved a dismissive hand. "Knew that." "She's looking for a new Supreme General." "I could have GUESSED that, Lessente. Stop wasting my time." Lessente sweated. The Baron's moods were unpredictable, but he was starting to sound just like the Queen before she vapourised someone for irritating her. "Er... But she's not that impressed with any of us High Generals. She's rather at a loss with working out who to elevate to the position. The rumours say that this time she won't bother and take a more hands-on approach to ruling." "Oh?" "There is also speculation that she'll bring Villyn into things." "Indeed?" The Baron leaned back and contemplated. "That IS interesting. If not that surprising. Thank you, Lessente, you can go. Try to be more helpful next time." "Uh... yes, Baron." Bowing nervously, Lessente disappeared in a burst of miniature liquor bottles. They smashed into shards as they hit the ground, and the Baron winced. He'd have to clear that up later. The Baron remained leaning back in his chair, contemplating. The Darkverse without a Supreme General... It was unheard of. The Queen would be so pressured by the habits of millenia that she would be sure to appoint one eventually, no matter what she thought would be the best to do. And with the position Villyn had taken in her life, the chances were he'd end up in an important role in the Darkverse, perhaps even the Supreme General position. The Baron chewed his lip. Come to think of it, Villyn in just the Supreme General position was unlikely. He was much more likely to become King. And then maybe Supreme General on top of that. With that idiot in charge of the Darkverse, or at least partially in charge... ...and the reincarnated Queen of the Crystal Kingdom effectively out of the picture... The Baron smiled nastily. He'd be able to easily overcome both of them and finally do something about putting the Kingdom of Obscurity on the map. It had been Obscure for far too long. He started manically laughing. Something was missing. He stopped laughing, reached over and hit Play on the stereo, and evil villain music started playing. THEN he resumed laughing, low to start with and increasing in volume. Just as the music hit a crescendo he stopped laughing and started ranting instead. "YES!" he shouted. "It is a perfect plan! For I am the planner of all planners! A genius amongst geniuses! The cog that drives the wheel! Yes, I am Baron Carrlson von Stagner of the Kingdom of Obscurity, which shall not be Obscure much longer!!" "SHUT UP!" yelled his neighbours. "We're trying to watch Darkwing Duck here!" * * * In the far north-east of Honshuu, a long LONG way from Tokyo... For the past couple of days Yukiko had been feeling very strange. She felt like something was missing, and in its place was half-remembered knowledge. Only she had no idea what was missing and couldn't remember what the knowledge was supposed to be, and it was very frustrating. To try and push it out of her mind, today she had been out with friends. Along the way, they'd come across a bedraggled squirrel on the side of the road. She'd instantly taken to it, and taken it along with her. What she and her friends hadn't been prepared for was when the squirrel started talking. It hadn't said anything very much, just things like "where is she", "nuts", "it's all gone wrong", "want nuts", and "NEED nuts." She'd given it some peanuts, it had recovered, taken one look at her, and screamed. She shook the squirrel. "Hey! What was that about?" Sayaki looked at her oddly. "Yukiko, why are you talking to a squirrel?" "You heard it talking, it makes sense that if it can talk it can understand us too." "...oh, of course." "And I can understand you," the squirrel said. "Though you don't make much sense." She shook the squirrel once more. "Explain, you." "You're not who you're supposed to be. You're supposed to be a Sailor, but just before I find you you somehow lose the Sailor bit and gain something else." Inasmuch she could understand squirrel expressions, it looked puzzled. "Almost as if you're suddenly the Queen." It was clearly mad. "You're clearly mad," she said to it. "No, I'm not!" it protested. But she left it on the side of the road anyway. "Yukiko, that wasn't very nice," said Sayaki. "It was crazy, talking about Sailors and Queens. Next thing you know it'd have been saying I have to take some magical device and turn into some miniskirted heroine and save the world several times and become really famous." Yukiko paused. Put like that... "And fall in love with a handsome masked stranger that uses dandelions to fight," said Rika, with the authority of someone who watched far too much anime for her own good. "You sure about that?" "Usually." "DANDELIONS?" "Or possibly roses, I'm not sure. It's just that roses have been done to death already." Yukiko thought about it, and her love life, or to be more precise, the disaster it had been so far. She thought for all of five seconds, then hurried back for the squirrel. * * * Standing around in the middle of the street might be fine for a short meeting, but it looked like the ten were going to be talking for quite some time. So they had decided to go and find a cafe to sit down in somewhere. Unfortunately, the wait staff had run along with everyone else, so the place was entirely deserted and they couldn't get served. But at least they could sit down. After a morning of running around, it was a welcome change. Sakyou hadn't known much more than he'd said, just that the Harbringers were on the side of the Dragon of Earth, and that they needed all the Harbringers for the Dragon to awaken. Beyond that, his knowledge was remarkably vague. Yoruko wasn't much help either, and knew even less. They didn't even know if the Dragon of Earth was supposed to be good or bad. "Well," said Tejina, trying to ignore her rumbling stomach, "it's the Dragon of Earth, right? That means it's on the side of earth and good, doesn't it?" "But the other one is the Dragon of Heaven," said Hanaki. "Whenever there's a big climactic apocalyptic fight it's usually the Heaven side that's the good one." "Don't forget that Sakyou said that there might be other Dragons," said Ayame. "That means the sides probably aren't as simple as a 'good' side and a 'bad' side. There may be no 'right' side at all, even." "But..." said Keiko. "I've heard Matsuro's destiny. It's much more complicated than all this..." Sakyou looked confused. "You know his destiny?" asked Yoruko. "Don't forget," she said, ignoring Yoruko's interruption, "that he was a general in the Darkverse or something, and that he was going to marry Princess Annikki and bring the two kingdoms together..." "Huh?" asked Sakyou. He was ignored, again. "That's still part of my destiny?" Matsuro asked. "Just a small part," she said, looking wretched. "This stuff about the Dragons is just another small part. And... I'm not in there at all..." He took her in his arm, looking awkward, and patted her shoulder nervously. "Uh... there there," he said. "But I'm not!" she wailed. "My destiny can go get lost," he said. "But you can't do that. That's the thing about destinies," she said, then wailed some more into his shoulder. "You can't escape them..." "Look," said Sakyou, "could you please explain all this? We need to know such weird things about our fellow Harbringers." Ayame took her cue, and started expositing. After ten minutes, expressions started to glaze. After half an hour some of the group were asleep. Only when Aki had the presence of mind to use the Brackets of Power did Ayame stop. * * * The sqirrel had introduced itself as Esu, and after a nice big bag of peanuts decided to overlook Yukiko leaving him behind. It was now quite some time later, and still in the middle of expositing, and was being interrupted by Yukiko and Rika and Sayaki a lot. "So Yukiko's not actually a Sailor," said Sayaki. "Even though I'm supposed to be," said Yukiko. "Yes, I said that," said Esu. "I don't know why but you've somehow lost the Sailor part and instead have what looks like the essence of the Queen." "The Queen, huh? You mean the Queen isn't one of the Sailors?" "That's right. Instead, she more sort of rules them and sends them off into death-defying missions and such. But but but but, the weird thing is, just a few weeks ago I was talking to the current reincarnation of the Queen. Even if she died since then, which I'm sure I would have noticed, we'd have to wait for a couple of decades for her next incarnation to grow up. So quite how *you* became the Queen I have no idea." "This'd make for a really cool anime," said Rika. Yukiko and Sayaki ignored her. "Do you have any proof that I'm this... 'Queen Amore'?" The little squirrel looked abashed, and its tail started doodling random designs in the snow. "Actually, we've never quite been in this position before. Usually, it's the Queen who alerts the Advisors to start finding the reincarnations of the Sailors. We've never had to find the Queen before. As far as any of us Advisors know she doesn't have any magical devices, and she doesn't transform. All I can say is that deep within you you should KNOW you're the Queen. You should be able to sense the Sailors, even if they haven't been awakened yet. You should be able to remember the history of the Crystal Kingdom." "So you're saying I should 'look deep within myself.'" "Cliched, I know, but yeah." This was all extremely incredible and hard to believe, but it had struck a chord within her, somehow. Also, it would explain the weird feeling she'd been having the last couple of days. The half- remembered knowledge would be the Queenly essence, wouldn't it? She closed her eyes, to concentrate better. She had absolutely no idea how she was supposed to be doing this... She tried to focus on the new feeling within her. Just as soon as she thought she had a grip on it, it slipped from her grasp. Mentally cursing, she tried to focus again, this time being much more careful. It slipped from her grasp again. And again. And again. She screamed in frustration. "What is it, Yuki-chan?" "There's something there, but I just can't get a hold of it! Whenever I try it slips away!" Esu looked thoughtful, and started scribbling equations in the ground, occasionally asking Yukiko for a detail or two. The girls tried to follow what he was scribbling, but it had grown extremely complicated. And then the equations started to simplify, until finally there was a '-1' in the snow. Esu looked at it thoughtfully, then looked up at Yukiko. "Instead of trying to grab and smother it, let *it* smother *you*," he said. She did. Her eyes closed... ...and Queen Amore's eyes opened. "Yuki-chan? Your eyes look different!" She blinked. "Ah, your eyes look more normal now." "Good god..." Yukiko said in horror. "My life... The sacrifices I had to make... The things I had to do, hating myself for it..." "Not you, Yuki-chan," said Sayaki, "Queen Amore." "I AM Queen Amore, now. Maybe not through the usual way, but I am." She turned to face Esu. "Esu, I'm currently not old enough to travel independently, so go bring Chiang here as soon as you can. I have to talk with him." "Right away, Majesty." Esu opened a dimensional door and zipped through. The three girls stared at the ornate little door as it closed and disappeared in a burst of nuts. "Yuki-chan, this is very weird." "Sayaki, that is the Understatement Of The Century," said Yukiko. * * * Villyn tried to ignore the two pygmies Buhp-something and Vihik- something. Their lack of height meant he couldn't see them sitting on the sofa, but he still knew they were there. Their very presence was worrying. It meant he was actually taking their story seriously. And that meant he was actually thinking that Charity-chan was responsible for stealing the pygmies' Holy Artifact. But he KNEW she wouldn't do that. But she was also an Evil Queen, wasn't she? Surely lying was part of the job? He HAD to find out about this. Just as soon as Charity-chan came, of course. He looked up at the clock - it was five in the afternoon. He chewed his lip nervously. She should be coming any minute now. Oh gods, what could he say? ...the doorbell rang. That must be her. "I'LL GET IT!" shouted the minions, from various parts of the house. "NO!" he bellowed. "This time it is for me to answer! Stay where you are, my minions!" Ignoring their protests, he strode purposefully to the door, and opened it purposefully, and said in a booming and commanding way "We have to talk." "If it's about the postcards from your Aunt Villynes that you never recieved I can explain everything!" the postman squeaked in terror. Charity-chan turned up a little later when he was signing for a special delivery, so the dramatic effect he had wanted when she arrived was ruined somewhat. But considering the intended dramatic effect, this was probably a good thing. * * * After an incredibly long and bizarre day, Tejina, Hanaki, and Ayame let themselves into the Nakao household, managed to stagger into Tejina's bedroom, and then crashed. Daisy and Pepper looked up from their poker game. At least, they were pretty sure it was poker. Daisy was somehow managing to hold five cards in her paws, and there were five cards magically floating inside the fishbowl. "Hi ev'rybody," lisped Daisy, "how'sh your day been?" "'s been a long day," mumbled Tejina, lying face down on the bed. "I jus' wanna sleep for the nex' twelve hours..." "Don't forget, Tej," said Hanaki with the conviction that something bad was about to happen to somebody else, "that despite everything you still have band practice in a couple of hours!" "Oog," mumbled Tejina. "Call Kireiko and Matsuro an' tell 'em I've died or something..." "I'sh been a bad day?" asked Daisy. "First there was a horde of robots. Then there were two Harbringer guys who said Matsuro and Tej and Becky and Keiko are involved with some Dragons. Then because everybody, including cab and train drivers, had run away from the robots we couldn't catch a taxi or go on the subway. So we had to walk all the way home. It's been very tiring," exposited Ayame. "Dragons?" asked Daisy. "Horde of robots?" asked Pepper. Ayame opened her mouth, ready to exposit. "Don't you even think about, Mo... er, sis," said Hanaki. "You've done enough expositing for the day." She turned her attention to Pepper. "And you, fishbrain," said Hanaki. "Because I need to go through a song and dance routine with you to transform and you weren't there I had to be the damsel in distress again." "I didn't choose the transformation sequence," retorted Pepper. "And the old Princess Felice took me wherever she went." "Well, SHE might have but *I* can't do that. It'd look too weird if a fishbowl followed me everywhere. So work something else out already." "Hmm," hmmed Pepper. "Hmm," hmmed Daisy. "How about a communicator?" asked Pepper. "Shoundsh good," said Daisy. "A communicator?" "Yes. When you need to transform, you press the button on it, it tells me you need me there, and I open a dimensional door and zip over there, and we can go through the sequence." "Sounds great," said Hanaki. "Yeah!" cheered Ayame, and did her best to grab up and hug the fishbowl. "A great idea! Go for it Pep!" "Good lord," mumbled Pepper. "'Pep'?" "But it's such a CUTE name!" Hanaki tapped her foot. "The communicator?" "Okay," said Pepper, "Just let me conjure one up..." The fishbowl floated away from Ayame, and Pepper started chanting in what sounded like a forgotten and mystic language. The fishbowl started to circle through the air, trailing magical sparks behind it. It moved slowly at first, then became faster and faster, the tempo of Pepper's chanting becoming faster in kind. Eventually it was moving so fast it was a mere blur, and Pepper's chant was a high pitched squeaking, and the trails formed several perfect golden circles. And then the fishbowl's spinning abruptly ended, and the water in the fishbowl STILL stayed in, instead of being flung into Hanaki's face as you might expect. The golden circles in the air contracted to a small glowing golden shape. The object stopped glowing and dropped to the floor. Hanaki picked it up and looked at it. It was in the shape of a white... thing. It looked a cross between a bat, rabbit, and a squirrel. On it was written "Let's play with Babi- chan!" Hanaki glared at Pepper. "Couldn't you have found something less embarassing?" "Hey, I did the spell and that's what I got." Hanaki sighed and pressed the obvious button. Pepper's fishbowl started vibrating at high speed, but the water stayed in. Truly it was a magic fishbowl. "Wwwhhhaaattt ttthhheee hhheeeccckkk iiisss ttthhhiiisss???" asked Pepper, his voice a perfect vibrato. Hanaki smiled evilly. "JUST what the doctor ordered," she laughed. Tejina and Ayame looked at their sister nervously. She'd never sounded so deranged before. "CCCooouuulllddd yyyooouuu ssstttoooppp hhhooollldddiiinnnggg dddooowwwnnn ttthhheee bbbuuutttooonnn, pppllleeeaaassseee?" "Now I can get back at him for all the times he's annoyed me," sighed Hanaki happily, "All those times he got his bit of the transformation sequence wrong... All those times Mom had to bail me out..." She then noticed something else about the communicator. "Hey look! I can change the intensity from low..." The fishbowl stopped vibrating quite as much. "...to really really high!" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGH!" commented the crazily shaking Pepper. "I'd advishe you to reshtric' the ushagzhe of the communicator to jush' when you need Pepper to sshow up," advised Daisy. "Aw shucks," said Hanaki, but she did turn the communicator off. "What have I done?" moaned the goldfish. * * * A couple of hours later, Tejina had managed to grab some sleep and so instead of being horribly-almost-dead tired she was just tired. The doorbell rang. The rest of the band had arrived. "Gee, Tejina, you look tired," said Kireiko as he lugged his amp into the basement. "I've had a long and trying day and really wish we didn't have band practice. Can't we put it off or something?" "Don't forget," said Becky, "we have a gig coming up at the Tokyo Tower Music Festival, and we need as much practice as possible." "Tokyo Tower Music Festival?" asked Matsuro. "Yeah." He frowned, concerned. On his bishounen features it just made him look even cooler. "That could be... difficult. I've been warned that I'm supposed to stay away from the Tower." "Just as long as you don't go in it, things should be okay," said Keiko, and smiled at him. "I think." "I hope you're right," said Matsuro, as he set the last cymbal in place. "Are we all set up then?" There was a general chorus of 'yeahs'. "Okay, how about we try that new one, 'I Wear My Pink Elephant Hat'?" asked Tejina. Becky started laughing like a madwoman for some reason. "What is it, Becky?" Becky wiped the tears of mirth from her eyes and her uncontrolled laughing became hysterical giggling. "Oh... nothing much, Tej... 'I Wear My Pink Elephant Hat' is perfectly fiaaAABWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" Tejina glared at Becky. "You mean it isn't." Becky had managed to get her laughing mostly under her control, but didn't reply. "Oh fine, whatever," said Tejina. "Most people there probably don't know what it means anyway. Alright then, Matsuro, you and Becky start." Becky smothered her amusement as much as possible and joined in with Matsuro in providing a rousing beginning. "Now you Kireiko." Guitar power chords started interspersing themselves within the drums and bassline, sending messages of fire up and down the spinal column. "Build up..." The music built to a crescendo, the guitar beomcing much more prominent. Kuro, the Nakao family dog, placed his paws over his ears and whimpered in anticipation. "And..." Tejina and Hanaki picked up their microphones, ready to start singing. Tejina and Matsuro disappeared. The music came to a stop in a sudden confused mess of sound as Kuro started howling. "What the HELL?" shouted Kireiko. "Where'd they go!?" Becky and Keiko looked faintly green. "Becky? Keiko?" "There's... something weird..." said Becky. "Amazing magic..." whispered Keiko. "Huh? I don't feel anything," said Kireiko. * * * Tejina and Matsuro found themselves in a perfect replica of the Nakao basement. Perfect, except for the missing crowd of people and pets. A sinister trenchcloaked figure appeared before the two. On his trenchcoat was a badge with an emblem of a cracked earth - with a shock Tejina realised that in her dream her clones had been building a three dimensional replica of the cracked earth symbol. "Greetings," it said. "I am Yoshimichi of the Seals, champions of the Dragon of Heaven, and natural enemies of the Harbringers. One of you is the One and also one of the Seals, and will join me tonight. The other..." and at this point he drew a long sword from his thigh "...shall die." * * * WHO SHALL LIVE? WHO SHALL DIE? WHO ARE THE SEALS? WHO ARE THE HARBRINGERS? WHAT DO THEY MEAN BY 'WILDCARDS? HOW MANY DRAGONS *ARE* THERE, ANYWAY? WHO IS THE 'ONE'? IS IT THE SAME 'ONE' THAT ZATHRAS BABBLES ABOUT? IS IT MATSURO? IS IT TEJINA? WHEN WILL THE EVIL SAILORS SHOW UP IN TOKYO? WHAT WILL HAPPEN WITH VILLYN AND CHARITY? WILL THE AUTHOR GET AWAY WITH WRITING NO CTHULU / SHUBBY-CHAN SCENES AT ALL? HOW WILL YUKIKO DEAL WITH SUDDENLY BEING QUEEN? WHAT DOES SHE WANT TO TALK WITH CHIANG ABOUT? AND IS SAILOR EXPOSITION RELATED TO TATEWAKI KUNOU AT ALL? Tune in next week when all, some, or none of these questions may or may not be answered by Lawrence Chu! Give him a hand, everybody! Author's comments ----------------- Wai! That was great fun! And is that enough of a cliffhanger for you? It's funny how a story can just pick up and start steamrolling ahead. Before I sat down to start writing this chapter, I had almost no idea what I'd write, except for the thought 'must add in X type stuff.' About 60K later I'm having to force myself to stop. ^_^ Thanks must go to Yasha and Jonatan Streith for prereading. Thanks must also go to everyone else on the DGML, for their friendly insanity and occasional ideas I sto^H^H^Hpaid homage to. And thanks must also go to Chris from BAS (whose last name I unfortunately can't remember) for the idea to use the Kodomo no Omocha communicator. Everybody else, now you know who to blame. ^_^